All I Did was Hold a Door
October 25th, 2007 at 12:27 pm by Mark
Tags: anachronisms, asshats, happy, humor, nostalgia, sarcasm, sociology
There’s something that’s bothered me for a long, long time, and it’s changed my behavior a little.
If I walk up to a door to open it, I glance around to see if anyone else is close. If they are, I hold it open for them. It’s a simple thing, that most people don’t do at all any more.
Some people are semi-thankful, but can’t really be bothered to do much more than nod or half-grunt a, “Thanks,” before continuing to walk blindly around not paying attention to anyone else around them.
Occasionally, you get one of the uber-Feminists who will rip you a new butt for holding her door open. She’s perfectly capable of doing it herself, and what a chauvanistic piece of — *BONK!* — as the door hits her in the face, because she’s too busy complaining to note that you let it go and walked away… at which point, you’re demoted to misogynist, and… *rolls eyes*
I always wonder how those types react when they see me hold the door for the guy at the next door…
Unfortunately, most people these days are asshats and don’t care that I hold the door for them, at all. Why, no! I should be privileged for having held their door! I’m not antisocial (I’m really not), but stuff like that is exactly why I think the vast majority of people should get bent.
Needless to say, it is due to the above three classes of people that I don’t stop, hold the door, and wait for people to go through ahead of me. Bloody hell, half of the population are so brash and rude that they will jump right on through while I’m holding open for my lady, who I really wanted to walk in with…
Thus, I’m very good about holding it behind me. And, if I accidentally drop it as someone’s coming, I even go so far as to apologize to them.
Weird, eh?
But today, as I walked up to the door to a store, I noticed an elderly woman with a very young teenager approaching. Ignoring my usual instincts, I stopped, grabbed the door, held it open, and said, “After you!” as I ushered them inside.
The two looked me right in the eyes, and with large, genuine smiles, said, “Oh, thank you!” in unison.
Genuine thanks?! That’s so rare! I couldn’t help but say something, and when I opened my mouth, “My pleasure!” came tumbling out.
Again, more smiles. As they walked on into the store arm-in-arm, they leaned and whispered to one another, patted the others’ arms as they went.
Simply amazing.
Nostalgic, even, remember how people used to act when you did some random act of kindness…?
October 25th, 2007 at 1:37 pm
Anymore, if there is someone behind me, I’m most likely going to just hold the door open till they get to it and let it go on them. Too often, people just assume that the help I’m willing to offer extends to holding the door for anyone close enough to squeeze through. If they are polite, then they will have already reached for the door, and I will basically pass it on. If the people behind me are older or have small children or if they are handicapped, I will happily hold the door until they are clear. I can’t say I’ve ever gotten the feminist anti-guy-holds-the-door attitude, but what I do often get is people just assuming that I’m going to hold the door. And a quick thanks never hurts anyone.
October 25th, 2007 at 2:10 pm
Not the handica— oops! errr— physically challenged. The last one of those I held the door open for had stashed half of WalMart (and a bit of Kroger) in his chair…
The one prior got an attitude and ripped me a new butt because she was perfectly able to do it herself and didn’t need my pity. Of course, I think she was one of those uber-Feminists in disguise…
Some days, you just can’t win… heh
[Ok, ok, while absolutely true, no, I hold no such prejudices, and still hold the door open behind me where applicable. I’m not a heartless bastard, no matter what some people might think]
October 25th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
You’ve held the door for me before. And although I smiled and we enjoyed conversation and beer… And although I didn’t rip you a new one, I was screaming inside… “WTF!!!! Who does he think he is acting like a complete gentleman, letting me walk in the door before him????”
Really now. I can only speak from what I know. It is so rare to be with a man who takes the time to do small, but very important little things. I guess since it’s not something women are used to these days, they take offense. You are a gentleman and so is my Anthony, that in mind I have grown very used to (and quite frankly spoiled) the kindness shown when the door is opened for me or a lighter is flicked when I get out a ciggie.
It’s all in the little things.
All those uber-Fems should chill out and enjoy instead of wanking.
October 25th, 2007 at 10:36 pm
You gentleman you!
Yes, I do the same thing and feel the same way. We are a dying breed!
November 3rd, 2007 at 11:28 pm
I have been actively holding the door all, for some time, and am so amazed and pleased that so many others enjoy the reactions you recieve for such a simple act fo kindness.