Tags: asshats, food, humor, innuendo, laugh, racism, sarcasm
What’s more damaging: a couple of asshats who don’t pay you, or someone attacking your reputation?
Today I had two asshats who didn’t pay me. One of them was just being a typical asshat, with the same old boring excuses for being a deadbeat. The other came up with an elaborate story about how they installed incompatible software four days after I was in the system, but because it broke the other software and they didn’t bother to notify me that it was broken, and there was nothing in the logs about it being broken, that I owed them a two hour fix for free with no explanation of the situation before I went into fixing it other than, “It’s broke.”
No, see, that stuff doesn’t bother me… I’m used to it, as pissed as it makes me.
It was a third one that really stuck in my craw because it’s unfathomable:
“He ran across your site and you had some stuff on there that made it sound like you were racist… said he wouldn’t give you a penny for a day’s work.”
WTF? Exqueeze me?
No, seriously, that’s what kept me so worked up when I lived in Kentucky those three months… I couldn’t go five minutes without some asshat making up total horse pucky, and attempting to circumvent every single good thing I tried to do. Everything became a damn conspiracy, and I was behind every bit of it!
So I pressed about HTF he could come up with I’m sounding “like a racist” …
“Well damn I voted wrong” … like it is some sexual reference to Kenyan women
O. M. F. G.
So somebody claims I’m a racist, goes the extra mile to say they wouldn’t give me “a penny for a day’s work” because they’re too ignorant to know a couple of premium, dark coffee beans, instead turning it into something that even an overly-sensitive, extremely jealous girlfriend — or ex-girlfriend, wife, stalker, nutjob next door — couldn’t twist it into if she tried?
Let’s just say, just to even attempt to make any logic out of such a ridiculous assertion, that even if it had been a “sexual reference to Kenyan women,” how the Hell could that possibly make me a racist?
Unless he’s totally against racial mixing… thus making him…
A white trash cracker!
Oh, and there’s a meal I detest: a venison round steak (medium well), canned corn and canned green beans.
Apparently, that makes me a racist, too.
[ he says, as he laughs his way to the kitchen for seconds of injera, gored-gored and quince ]