Posts Tagged with "ak-47"

More Ways to Ruin a Perfectly Good Weapon

January 26th, 2012 at 5:42 pm by Mark
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I don’t know what’s worse: painting an AK pink with Hello Kitty, adding a ridiculous assortment of Tactical accessories, or putting this much Geektosterone™ into it …

Note: My new word, Geektosterone™.

Need Assault Rifle Accessories?

August 7th, 2011 at 10:00 am by Mark
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Like it or not, the best Assault Rifle accessory is still common sense.

Anonymous: "So I'm looking for a rail system for my ak. I find side rails fugly, but will settle for one if need be. was looking at something similar to what's in the pic, but idk if they suck or if they are for tacticool noobs. any input?"  Ivan Chesnokov: "WHY YOU WANT RAIL FOR KALASHNIKOV? IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH AS PROCURED FROM IZHEVSK MECHANICAL WORKS? YOU THINK NEEDS IMPROVEMENT? THEN MAYBE YOU FIND JOB WITH ARMY OF RUSSIA! YOU HAVE DRINKS WITH MIKHAIL KALASHNIKOV, TRADE STORY OF MANY WEAPONS DESIGNED AND DETAILS OF SCHOOL FOR ENGINEERING! OR MAYBE YOU DO NOT DO THIS. PROBABLY IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER DESIGN WEAPON IN WHOLE LIFE. YOU LOOK AT FINE RUSSIAN RIFLE, THINK IS NEED CRAZY SHIT STICK ON ALL SIDES OF WEAPON. YOU HAVE DISEASE OF AMERICAN CAPITALIST, CHANGE THING THAT IS FINE FOR NO REASON EXCEPT TO LOOK DIFFERENT FROM COMRADE. YOU PUT CHEAP FLASHLIGHT OF CHINESE SLAVE FACTORY ON ONE SIDE, YOU PUT BAD SCOPE OF AMERICAN MIDDLE WEST ON OTHER SIDE, YOU PUT FRONT PISTOL GRIP ON BOTTOM SO YOU THINK YOU ARE LIKE AMERICAN MOVIE GUY JOHN RAMBO. MAYBE YOU PUT SEX DILDO ON TOP TO FUCKING YOURSELF IN ASSHOLE FOR MAKING SHAMEFUL TRAVESTY OF RIFLE OF MIKHAIL KALASHNIOV, NO? RIFLE IS FINE. YOU FUCK IT, IT ONLY GET HEAVY AND STILL NO HIT LARGEST SIDE OF BARN. GO TO FIRING RANGE. PRACTICE WITH MANY MAGAZINE OF CARTRIDGE. THEN YOU NOT NEED DUMB SHIT PUT ON SIDE OF RIFLE."

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Mikhail Kalashnikov Rolls in his Grave

October 18th, 2007 at 3:45 pm by Mark
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[ 4:02PM EDT: My apologies, Mr. Kalashnikov, and a toast.  Cheers! ] 

     Typical of Asian “cute,” isn’t it?

HK-47

     It’s the “The Glambo Signature Series ‘Hello Kitty’ HK-AK-47” from GlamGuns.com:

The world should note the hand-crocheted shoulder-stock muffler and the anodized titanium plating. Several choices in stock wood are available. With a limited run of only 500, buy now before they’re gone! An mere $100 extra includes Glambo’s signature wood-burnt into the opposite side of the handguard. A perfect gift for the young lady of the house.
A bargain at only $1072.95!

     “A perfect gift for the young lady of the house,” huh?  I’m also sure this one is destined to be the new favorite of Thai Hookers.  And the Gay Mafia in Massachusetts.  And maybe Elmo when he snaps… That Grover just won’t return his affection.

     Really, I think I’ll stick with assault-rifle-black… On a pre-ban, milled Bulgarian at the rock-bottom price of only $425.

     *shakes head*

     Friggin’ vandals.

     I would sooner buy a Norinco

Tip: Anton. Photo from GlamGuns.com: Guns for Girls and Glamorous Weaponry.