Best Worst Mascara Review Ever

February 16th, 2013 at 12:15 pm by Michelle
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Ever left your most prized, expensive mascara in the car overnight during the summer or winter? Similar effect…

POST OF SHAME.  albinwonderland: "I'm really mad so lemme just put this psa out into the world. DO YOU SEE THIS MASCARA? THIS MASCARA IS CALLED MAYBELLINE THE ROCKET VOLUME EXPRESS. I WENT TO GO BUY MASCARA THE OTHER DAY AND THIS SHIT WAS ONE DOLLAR CHEAPER THAN MY USUAL MASCARA (rimmel sexy curves) SO I BOUGHT IT (because I'm a fool of a took) AND I COULD WRITE SONNETS ABOUT THE WAYS IN WHICH IT IS TERRIBLE. THE BRISTLES ARE ODDLY SHORT AND DON'T CATCH YOUR LASHES PROPERLY EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE RUBBER OR PLASTIC OR SOME PINE NEEDLE SHIT. IT CLUMPED ALL OF MY EYELASHES IMMIDIATELY UPON IMPACT AND THEY WOULDN'T SEPARATE EVEN USING AN EYELASH COMB. IT WOULD NOT COME OFF. AND NO IT IS NOT THE WATERPROOF KIND BECAUSE I CHECKED FOR THAT BEFORE AND AFTER BUYING IT. I USED MAKEUP REMOVER TWICE, CLEANSED MY FACE WITH THE STRENGTH OF GASTON, TONED LIKE OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN IN THE 80'S, AND STILL HAD OPAQUE BLACK STREAKS DOWN MY FACE. YOU KNOW HOW YOU BUY MASCARA AND YOU'RE SO EXCITED TO USE IT AND THEN THE FIRST TIME YOU DO IT'S LIKE THE HEAVENS OPEN UP AND LITTLE CHERUBS FLOAT DOWN FROM PEARLESCENT CLOUDS AND KISS YOUR EYELASHES GENTLY AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND THAT BEYONCE HERSELF HAS NODDED AT YOU AND WHISPERED "FIERCE"? USING THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME WAS MORE LIKE POOPING IN A PUBLIC TOILET. ON A SCALE OF ONE TO HORRENDOUS I WOULD GIVE IT ELEVEN MILLION STARS.  IM MAD!!!" arkhamsiren: "this is the best review of any product ever"


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