On May 12th, 2011, former Georgia Senator Newt Gingrich announced his plan to run for President of the United States in 2012.

Supporters of New York’s Donald Trump, who previously announced his intent to run for President, immediately demanded proof of whether Newt is an amphibian or a reptile. The Gingrich team countered, demanding clarification as to whether that “thing on Trump’s head” is a mammal or a marsupial.

Meanwhile, Trump’s toupee has filed a motion to amend the Bill of Rights by adding provisions against interspecial discrimination.

With this sort of craziness inherent in the upcoming elections, only one thing is certain: