Cellphones: The New Law & Religion

March 8th, 2014 at 5:47 pm by Jason
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This is almost the law of the land now. We can’t even drive a car without looking at our text messages and trying to reply even at the danger of having a wreck and killing ourselves or someone else.

Notice is hereby given that ALL CITIZENS MUST Everywhere Everyday Constantly Fiddle with their cell phones. AT NO TIME is it permissible to sit idle and observe the poetry of life or look into the eyes of another person. The arrival of a snippet of trivial text holds the promise of unimagined pleasure. Honor thy ringtone and jiggling hand-held devices above all other gods. REMEMBER ALWAYS: Practice constant devotion to the PRECIOUS OBJECT. Give full attention to the GLORIOUS TECHNOLOGY. Maintain unselfish love for the FLIMSY HARDWARE.


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