Unfortunate Names
October 26th, 2007 at 5:33 pm by Mark
Tags: humor, innuendo, names, sarcasm
Every once in a while, I run across some crazy names — things which are innocent, but could certainly sound like a prank phone call if you didn’t know any better. These are all true:
- I once knew a girl named Sunshine Beam. I knew another named Sunny Rae Dawn. Someone said their parents did drugs.
- I have a friend named Anita Brown-Dixon. Of course, I don’t think she’s ever had one, and certainly wouldn’t tell her son anything of the sort.
- I met a woman in Nashville named Anita Boner. She really loves her husband… A lot.
- I have another friend, a Pirate Chick no less, named Robyn Cox.
- A friend of a friend called to ask me for help with something. “Mark? This is Dick Sells.” I asked him who was buying.
- I once knew a guy named John Ope. His middle initial was L, and he usually went by Jack… “Hello, Mr. Jackalope!”
- I met Ira Fuson a few months ago…
- …and imagine my surprise to meet the real Benjamin Dover.
- Everyone knows at least one John Turner.
- There’s a huge family of Fags just south of here. Poor Richard… and some of them married Johnsons.
- There actually was a guy in a local high school named Mike Hunt. He lives in Oak Ridge.
October 26th, 2007 at 7:25 pm
Very funny…I won’t mention the Fonda Peters I once knew!
October 27th, 2007 at 12:50 am
Wait’ll you see the Business version of this very thing… I’m gonna try and post those next week …
Too bad RIMCO changed their sign … I was gonna get a photo today. heh
October 27th, 2007 at 1:49 am
Bite me …. LOL
October 27th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
Nah … Cuz you’d like it, and my girlfriend wouldn’t. heh
Nice to see you’re still around. 😉
October 27th, 2007 at 2:43 pm
Just the kind of wonderful sarcastic behavior I miss so dearly… Sorry, there for a while I thought that my needs just weren’t being met…
November 25th, 2007 at 1:08 am
I did business with with a guy named Dick Sass. No shit, seriously. He’s actually a CEO of a medical devices startup in Portland.
But, c’mon. If your last name is Sass, it doesn’t matter what your first name is – Tom Sass, Mark Sass. It always sounds like the possessive case. You get the idea. But why on Earth would you make it even worse by taking on the nickname, “Dick?”
January 8th, 2010 at 12:14 am
I’m sorry… I have no more full names to add have some interesting last names Nail and Sparks. I am just tired of see one post have all of the recent comments. After all, what does it really matter I don’t exist. Who knows? Maybe I really do exist…
December 8th, 2011 at 11:47 am
I saw this on google when I searched for Anita Boner. a older guy pulled up beside me and my friend when we were like 15 and asked if we knew where this girl lived, I figured he was messing around or maybe a turd burglar.
Btw, there is a guy here in Virginia by the name of Dick Glover (dick lover lol)