(Yeah, their title, not mine — weird!)

     Ok, yet another in the list of “reasons I should not be awake.”

     Comedy Central is airing the Celebrity Roast of William Shatner on August, 20th at 10PM US/Eastern.

     That’s gotta be funny.

     I mean, he isn’t.

     Much.

     But he’s certainly provided plenty of propellant — pardon the pun — over the last forty years to assist in the conflagration… so many things… But the coup-de-grace has to be that bad music with Leonard Nimoy…

     Gives me chills just thinking about it.

     Tonight, I’ve been watching “Van Wilder” on Comedy Central.

     Towards the end of the movie, there was a commercial for the Helio.  “Don’t call us a phone company.”  “Get all your MySpace content right on your device!”
     From their website:

Helio puts you + your friends (not rates and minutes) at the center of our business, because the most important thing a mobile service can do is better connect you to your friends.
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 .
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We won’t nickel and dime you. Get All-In with our all inclusive membership and get access to MySpace, H.O.T. (Helio On Top), video, speedy 3G, and much, much more.

     Now, that’s all fine and good.  But their ad was *strategically* placed just prior to the Van Wilder scene:

We are now in session.  Mr. Wilder, you were found in violation of Article Section B of Coolidge’s bylaws — soliciting of alcohol to extreme minors…

     Coincidence?

     All you have to do is search Google…

     Looks like a cool device, tho… But Helio should certainly play down the whole MySpace thing.  I mean, who needs that kinda class-action?

     I wrote the title … that’s about all the “clever” I can muster for this one.
     *shakes head in disapproval*

Tip: Link Right 2

     The book, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, looks to be a great read!  It’s an elaborate parody of Intelligent Design:

CAN I GET A “RAMEN” FROM THE CONGREGATION?!

Behold the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), today’s fastest growing carbohydrate-based religion. According to church founder Bobby Henderson, the universe and all life within it were created by a mystical and divine being: the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
     .
     .
     .
Within these pages, Bobby Henderson outlines the true facts– dispelling such malicious myths as evolution (“only a theory”), science (“only a lot of theories”), and whether we’re really descended from apes (fact: Humans share 95 percent of their DNA with chimpanzees, but they share 99.9 percent with pirates!)

     The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster’s website has, of course, been targeted by many people who are unable to take a joke.
     Fortunately, they’ve opened up their hate-mail archive to the public.  It’s also fortunate that we have idiots like Casey Powell to give us something to laugh about.

     [ of course, I have to thank Swanky for pointing me towards all of this — good stuff! ]

      Some people have little else to do but send ludicrous hate mail, due in no small part but that so many people have little room for humor in their day-to-day lives.  It’s sad.
     Me, I get some local psychotic nutjob sending me scathing e-mails and blog comments claiming that I’m the father of her five-year-old child (an impossibility, given the fact that I lived in another country at the time).
     Others get morons like Casey Powell, who profess Christianity while sending vulgar and abusive e-mails, threaten lawsuits because the owner posted them publicly, and finally come out and deny that it was him at all — no, in fact, it was his evil twin.
     I should introduce Casey to Laney.  
     Laney would dig Casey’s methods with a dumbfounded, “Suing that guy for posting your own comments and claiming it was someone else who made them?  Why didn’t I think of that?”
     And sure Casey would dig her whole birth-without-sex story, which would surely remind him of the Gospel of Matthew.

     Their union and subsequent child just might be enough to signal the Coming of the Great While Colander.

     LR2 posted a great link today to The Best Page in the Universe.

     It’s no secret what I think of 9/11 Revisionist morons.  Faced with hard evidence and eyewitness accounts, they are stupid enough to simply ignore the fact that more than a few people saw, let’s say, a plane hit the Pentagon, for instance.
     But Maddox hit the nail on the head — with a sledgehammer, mind you.  That Glenn Beck / $100 Bill folding bit is freaking brilliant!

     As far as I’m concerned, these “Loose Change” asshats are case in point that Condoms are only 97% effective when used properly.