Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

If Your Shoes Aren’t Evil?

March 18th, 2015 at 5:38 pm by Mark
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Remember that one about the evil shoes a few days ago? The Stallone treatment might not be a precursor to aching feet, too…

Shoes: Stallone vs. Vans

Have a Safe St. Patrick’s Day

March 17th, 2015 at 5:33 pm by Mark
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It’s interesting how everyone’s forgotten that St. Patrick’s Day was a celebration of the official debut of Christianity in Ireland, whereas in a America, it’s a day to get blind drunk on green beer while wearing as much green-colored clothing as possible…

St. Patrick's Day In America: Crazy Party.  Meanwhile, in Ireland...

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Video Game Logic: Running

March 16th, 2015 at 5:45 pm by Mark
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As much as consoles have improved over the years, some Video Games still make no sense on a regular basis. Many times it’s like, “Oh, you can’t pick up that scrap of paper,” but you’re carrying 15 hunting rifles, 8 sniper rifles, 100 grenades, 20 assorted pistols and 30 submachine guns … in your pockets…

Video Game Logic: "Soldier in Nanosuit worth Millions can only run for 15 seconds. Overweight Itlalian plumber can run forever."
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Catch Tonight’s Episode of The Walking Dead?

March 15th, 2015 at 9:54 pm by Mark
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Tonight was the first time in a few weeks something actually HAPPENED on The Walking Dead!

The Walking Dead: Everybody Ate Chris

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Walmart’s Fake Advertising

March 15th, 2015 at 5:52 pm by Mark
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What annoys me more at Walmart these days is that all the self-checkout and express lanes are closed…

Walmart: I know this pic is fake cause there's a person at each register line