Posts Tagged with "call of duty"

Video Game Logic: Running

March 16th, 2015 at 5:45 pm by Mark
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As much as consoles have improved over the years, some Video Games still make no sense on a regular basis. Many times it’s like, “Oh, you can’t pick up that scrap of paper,” but you’re carrying 15 hunting rifles, 8 sniper rifles, 100 grenades, 20 assorted pistols and 30 submachine guns … in your pockets…

Video Game Logic: "Soldier in Nanosuit worth Millions can only run for 15 seconds. Overweight Itlalian plumber can run forever."
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Unemployment Expected to Rise

November 13th, 2012 at 7:48 pm by Mark
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As expected, nearly 1.5 million jobs were terminated today after the midnight release of Call of Duty: Black Ops II. Due to a complete lack of production, the Dow Industrial closed at nearly 60 points down today, despite the sharp upturn in retail spending. Economic Analysts are still skeptical, given the expected 1% rise in unemployment claims due for Wednesday, November 14th.

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Analysts Hopeful About Consumer Spending

November 12th, 2012 at 7:53 pm by Mark
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As the November 13th, 2012 release of Call of Duty: Black Ops II nears, analysts are hopeful about the sudden stimulation in late night consumer retail spending. Not since 2009 has there been such an anticipated video game release, which is assured to cause the Obama camp to issue a statement taking credit for the slight economic upturn.

Many Analysts, however, urge vigilance, as news of an additional rash of unemployment is expected to follow on November 15th, 2012.

Video Game Stimulates Consumer Spending

November 10th, 2009 at 12:51 pm by Mark
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     At 12:01AM Tuesday, November 10th, 2009, Infinity Ward’s much lauded video game, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, was released with much fanfare. Retailers such as Gamestop, Walmart and Target have reported record post-midnight sales, with regular sales expected to increase throughout the Holiday season.
     White House economic analysts are baffled at the sudden, unexpected increase in consumer spending, however, the Obama camp is taking credit for the situation nonetheless.

     When President Obama was interrupted during this morning’s back-door meeting with other White House smokers, he was asked how a Video Game manufacturer has managed to stimulate the economy moreso than any amount of Presidential tactics used since his election.
     An obviously perplexed Obama replied, “Umm…

     Despite this unexpected economic upturn, the Federal rate of umemployment is expected to increase sharply during the next few weeks, especially in males between the ages of 35 and 45 who own an Xbox 360.

10-Nov-2009 11:25AM

     We will attempt to keep you informed of more important economic updates here at


Socializing on Xbox 360’s Xbox LIVE

October 23rd, 2009 at 10:53 pm by Mark
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     So I’m sitting down to play another friggin’ boring game of Call of Duty: World at War on the Xbox 360.  I hate that game.  I truly do.  I play it because a few friends drag me in, and tonight, I decided try and improve my gamer score a little. 
     But no bones about it, I hate the game.  It’s laggy-slow.  It commandeers bandwidth worse than the porn-hungry neighbor who “stealz ur internets.”  The glitches and screen artifacts pretty much screw up any chance of having a decent experience playing the game in multiplayer mode.  The bug reporting mechanism to the manufacturer, Treyarch, pretty well leaves you open to be bashed and belittled by the game’s developers for even having the balls to open your mouth about their precious turd.
     And if friends would stop playing it, so would I.  Which is why I’m looking forward to Infinity Ward’s release next month:  Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, because Treyarch, and their patheticly overdone World War II scenarios, can suck my left nut, right nut and anus.  Or, better yet, Brandon’s anus…

     So anyway … About an hour ago, I was abruptly disconnected from Xbox LIVE for an update.  It took a several minutes. 
     “Okay, WTF?”
     My Xbox restarted, downloaded a few more updates.  Restarted again.

     By 10PM EST, I was back online, with a new tab in my dashboard.

     “Xbox Preview.”

     Ahh, looking around… Facebook? Check.  Twitter?  Check.  Zune Video Marketplace?  Check.  Xbox LIVE News?  Check.  MSNBC?  Check.  Dillbert?  Check.  The New Yorker Cartoons?  Check.  Well… if you can call it that.

     Yep … all working … trippy … so I send out a couple of test messages on Twitter, update my Facebook status, browse friends and leave a couple comments…
     Then I start screwing around with the absolute worst interface ever:  The app seriously sucks.  I can’t even explain “why” it sucks, except to say, you’ll have to experience the suckiness yourself to understand.  Basically, if you’re looking for something easy to use, sensible, start a channel and add music to it, you’re pretty well going to be in “WTF?” land for a while.

     That aside … It’s still a bunch of neat new toys.  If you’d like to sign up for the “next generation” Xbox 360 Dashboard, go and register.  And get one of these, because you’re gonna need it…

     Why, now, I can see when this Brandon twit decides to Tweet that he’s going to take a crap … without having to log into my PC … *rolls eyes*