Proof is in the picture —- and bear in mind, this is absolutely NOT retouched! This is the actual ad shown on the Google AdSense section of this very page on January 9th, 2006 at 11:15AM EST!

Man! Who knew? I’ll bet all those Al-Queda who went to Afghanistan to get their Terrorism Certificates really feel stupid now.

Remember, you heard it here first!

On Thursday (5-Jan-06), 700 Club spokesman and former Presidential hopeful Pat Robertson told everyone that Ariel Sharon’s stroke had one simple reason: “God’s wrath.”

Local columnist Sam Venable let him have it but good.

For a man who claims to be a purveyor of Good News, this guy has done more to turn people away from Christianity than an army of atheists.
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The 9/11 attacks?

God’s wrath.

The Gulf hurricanes?

God’s wrath.

(Athletic interpretation: God’s wrath was the reason the University of Southern California lost the Rose Bowl. It had nothing to do with being outplayed and outscored by those heavenly blessed, sin-free cherubs representing the University of Texas.)

In Preacher Pat’s line of reasoning, we should file every unpleasantness in our lives – allergies and flu, monetary and marital failures, vocational and educational woes, transmission troubles and computer glitches – under the general heading of God’s wrath for some sin, known or unknown, that we may have committed.

If so, it’s a wonder the entire lot of humanity down through the ages hasn’t gone insane from guilt.

You have to wonder which Bible it is that Pat Robertson reads, because it really seems to be missing a Testament. It’s probably fallen out with all of the bashing he does with it.

I would urge readers to chip in $0.01 each so we could buy him a new one, with a yellow highlighter marking up the first four books of the New Testament, but I’m sure he’d just hit one of us in the head with it.

Nice … Panda?

This Chinese restaurant is on Callahan Drive in Knoxville. At one point, I did try and ask an elderly gentleman why there was a picture of a Koala above the name Panda Garden. He just kept repeating, “Pan’ Ga’den,” over and over as he nodded and smiled. I tried to explain, but eventually digressed to respond in kind.

Ok, I just lost it when Nadia showed me this great photo and caption from MSN’s 2005 Year in Review.

If this unfortunate car could talk, it would probably say, Uh-oh, looks like I’ve got a smidge of skank on my hood.

Too funny… yet, somehow, fitting.

Although, considering it’s Bai Ling, she does have more of herself covered than usual.

According to a Reuters news report from early this morning, a 20-year-old German child-porn offender surrendered to Police after getting one of those annoying, fake e-mails from the Sober.Y virus. The message clearly stated that he was being investigated by the German Federal Criminal Police Office, and scared him badly enough that he decided to just go ahead, confess, and turn himself in.

Quoth a spokesman from the Paderborn police: “It just goes to show that computer worms aren’t always destructive … Here it helped us to uncover a crime which would otherwise probably have gone undetected.”

Of course, he failed to mention that blatent stupidity and severe paranoia played the biggest part. Yay!