Posts Tagged with "Santa"

No More Christmas Candy

January 7th, 2014 at 5:02 pm by Mark
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The Holidays are over, Christmas candy is on clearance, and some people just can’t help themselves, can they?

The Holidays are Over...

Mrs. Claus is Still Angry

December 28th, 2012 at 7:13 pm by Mark
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Santa’s looking a bit thinner three days later…

Santa:"OK! Yes! I went to my old girlfriend's house last night! It's my job!"

Stock Photos

Santa Sure Looks Good in Those Jockey Shorts

November 6th, 2007 at 10:59 am by Diva
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xmascuteguy.jpgYou know, for the past decade, I kept thinking to myself “Damn. Christmas seems to come earlier and earlier every year. I thought it was only in my head because I am simply annoyed by how commercial Christmas has become.

I took note, back in August no less, that as soon as Wal-Mart took out the swimming pools and other summer items… in came the Christmas stuff. IN AUGUST! Before even halloween had time to come and go.

Pisses me off, the money-grubbing devil stores peddle as much as they can for as long as they can. And what really slays me is the fact that, everytime I’d pass through lawn & garden, even back in late summer, there were people buying that shit up. It wasn’t on sale, it was just out on display and for sale at regular prices.

Now I don’t know about you, but I certainly don’t want my house decorated with little elves and the like that early in the year. I’m the type that as soon as Christmas is over, I’m ready to jerk the ornaments down and sling the tree in the yard.

What I think should happen is, since the the stores have all the Christmas crap out that early, the Salvation Army should round up sexy bell ringers and have them out there in the heat of summer in a Santa-like underwear  made of red velvet with white trim and an excellent and yummy tan.  Then maybe I could swallow Christmas that early in the damn year.

Bah!  Friggin Humbug!