After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.
February 6th, 2015 at 5:48 pm by Mark
Tags: beavis, butthead, dillholes, james franco, pickles, seth rogen, walmart
As opposed to the “New” Dill Wholes, Seth Rogen and James Franco…
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February 5th, 2015 at 5:55 pm by Mark
Tags: doctors, funny names, irony, lyrics, thompson twins
I wonder how many people have walked in and said, “Can’t you see I’m burning, burning?”
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February 4th, 2015 at 5:53 pm by Mark
Tags: football, marshawn lynch, pete carroll, seahawks, superbowl
After a completely nonsensical decision to have Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson pass at the three yard line — giving the Patriots an interception and costing the Seahawks a Super Bowl victory — comedians are getting a lot of run out of coach Pete Carroll. More of a run, in fact, than Marshawn Lynch got out of coach Pete Carroll…
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February 3rd, 2015 at 5:10 pm by Mark
Tags: cross dressing, gremlins, star wars, yoda
After Anakin killed and entire village of sand people, Yoda admitted to Obi Wan that even he had some not-so-proud moments in his youth…
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February 2nd, 2015 at 5:17 pm by Mark
Tags: asshats, irony, peanuts, pie chart, psa
It is a sad truth that you and I both know someone who will not even realize this simple fact.
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