Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

Muscle Man Fail

March 3rd, 2012 at 11:18 am by Mark
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There is a suitable explanation for this that doesn’t include Photoshop, however, it would make this guy blind as a bat, with palms hairier than a Yeti’s butt…

What I Do: The Stormtrooper

March 2nd, 2012 at 5:46 pm by Mark
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Does anyone else ever wonder if the blue milk would make your pee blue? Just me? Thpft…

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

Twilight May Not Be So Useless After All…

March 1st, 2012 at 5:22 pm by Mark
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Most everyone, at some point in their life, finds it helpful to have a magazine or novel in the bathroom. This seems to fit the bill perfectly.

Tip: Paula, via Facebook

With Regard to Good Manners

February 29th, 2012 at 5:32 pm by Mark
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Many decry society based on a complete lack of good manners, evoking memories of an earlier time when the word “please” was always followed by a “thank you,” and a “thank you” was always followed by “you’re welcome.” While it’s true that many have no regard for others, it’s always good to see that at least a few of our youth have learned the value of these sorts of niceties.

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Facebook Needs More Blondes: Literally Blonde

February 25th, 2012 at 11:48 am by Mark
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The car she put on Craigslist has 140K miles, but was literally never driven.