After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.
March 3rd, 2012 at 11:18 am by Mark
Tags: fail, innuendo, masturbation, muscles, photoshop, yeti
There is a suitable explanation for this that doesn’t include Photoshop, however, it would make this guy blind as a bat, with palms hairier than a Yeti’s butt…

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March 2nd, 2012 at 5:46 pm by Mark
Tags: blue milk, jobs, star wars, Stormtroopers, what i do, work
Does anyone else ever wonder if the blue milk would make your pee blue? Just me? Thpft…

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March 1st, 2012 at 5:22 pm by Mark
Tags: bathroom, books, toilet paper, twilight
Most everyone, at some point in their life, finds it helpful to have a magazine or novel in the bathroom. This seems to fit the bill perfectly.

Tip: Paula, via Facebook
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February 29th, 2012 at 5:32 pm by Mark
Tags: english, funny signs, irony, language, sarcasm, social commentary
Many decry society based on a complete lack of good manners, evoking memories of an earlier time when the word “please” was always followed by a “thank you,” and a “thank you” was always followed by “you’re welcome.” While it’s true that many have no regard for others, it’s always good to see that at least a few of our youth have learned the value of these sorts of niceties.

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February 25th, 2012 at 11:48 am by Mark
Tags: blonde, craigslist, dress, dum, facebook, fail, sales
The car she put on Craigslist has 140K miles, but was literally never driven.

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