Former Max Rebo Bandmate, Sy Snootles, said, “I’m not surprised. Max Rebo gets more ass than a toilet seat. And besides, Earth girls are easy.”

Jabba the Hutt was unavailable for comment.

This just in … Or, well, because I just spent the last twelve minutes doing it …

In the original Star Wars trilogy, Christopher Walken, Richard Dreyfuss, John Travolta, Robert De Niro, Kurt Russell, Sylvester Stallone, Al Pacino, and Nick Nolte were all considered for the role of the now iconic Han Solo. Lucas didn’t want to use actors from his other films, such as American Graffiti, but Harrison Ford walked away with part.

Still, you have to wonder … What the Hell kind of name is “Han Solo,” anyway?

Don’t worry, young Skywalker. Everything’ll be fine now that Michael Jackson showed up.

This is quite possibly one of the worst renditions of Jabba the Hutt found in the wild, given that this Wedding cake actually looks more like a pile of poo.