Posts Tagged with "top ten"

The Year in Review: 2013

January 3rd, 2014 at 1:52 pm by Mark
Tags: , , ,

 

It’s been another great year for blogitude.com! Today, we’d like to recap our top ten, most popular & most shared posts from 2013:

Cassette Tape and a Bic Pen Have a Cigarette#10 – Age Test: Cassette Tape and a BIC Pen?
March 9th, 2013 at 5:38 pm by Mark

If you get this, it doesn’t mean you’re old. It just means you have a sick mind.

 

Shirt Tag: "100% Cotton, Machine Wash Cold. It's never so hot that you have to take off your shirt. Don't be that guy."#9 – Guys: It’s Never Too Hot to Take Off Your Shirt
July 8th, 2013 at 5:21 pm by Mark

According to most women, the only man allowed to take off his shirt at any given time is Channing Tatum.

 

I gained access to my friend's Facebook account. This was the only logical thing to do. Status: "I'm giving 10 bucks to the person who calls me with the best Chewbacca impression within the next 20 minutes. I expect the line will be busy, so don't linger when you call."#8 – Facebook Status Hack? Check. Phone Prank? Check.
March 10th, 2013 at 1:42 pm by Mark

This is the perfect time to perform the otherwise useless skill of yelling, “Dude! She called you a scruffy-looking nerf-herder!” in Shyriiwook.

 

Sign: "This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness." Grafitti: "NO WE WON'T"#7 – Stubborn Graffiti
April 18th, 2013 at 9:09 pm by Mark

Sounds like some women I know, too. 😉

 

Free Tattoo Removal - The Common Kitchen Grater#6 – Do-It-Yourself Tattoo Removal Kit
May 19th, 2013 at 5:34 pm by Mark

I’m not sure why I’ve had the sudden interest in bad tattoos lately. But for those in need, Amazon has a veritable treasure trove of tattoo removal gear to fit most every budget…

 

POST OF SHAME.  albinwonderland: "I'm really mad so lemme just put this psa out into the world. DO YOU SEE THIS MASCARA? THIS MASCARA IS CALLED MAYBELLINE THE ROCKET VOLUME EXPRESS. I WENT TO GO BUY MASCARA THE OTHER DAY AND THIS SHIT WAS ONE DOLLAR CHEAPER THAN MY USUAL MASCARA (rimmel sexy curves) SO I BOUGHT IT (because I'm a fool of a took) AND I COULD WRITE SONNETS ABOUT THE WAYS IN WHICH IT IS TERRIBLE. THE BRISTLES ARE ODDLY SHORT AND DON'T CATCH YOUR LASHES PROPERLY EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE RUBBER OR PLASTIC OR SOME PINE NEEDLE SHIT. IT CLUMPED ALL OF MY EYELASHES IMMIDIATELY UPON IMPACT AND THEY WOULDN'T SEPARATE EVEN USING AN EYELASH COMB. IT WOULD NOT COME OFF. AND NO IT IS NOT THE WATERPROOF KIND BECAUSE I CHECKED FOR THAT BEFORE AND AFTER BUYING IT. I USED MAKEUP REMOVER TWICE, CLEANSED MY FACE WITH THE STRENGTH OF GASTON, TONED LIKE OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN IN THE 80'S, AND STILL HAD OPAQUE BLACK STREAKS DOWN MY FACE. YOU KNOW HOW YOU BUY MASCARA AND YOU'RE SO EXCITED TO USE IT AND THEN THE FIRST TIME YOU DO IT'S LIKE THE HEAVENS OPEN UP AND LITTLE CHERUBS FLOAT DOWN FROM PEARLESCENT CLOUDS AND KISS YOUR EYELASHES GENTLY AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND THAT BEYONCE HERSELF HAS NODDED AT YOU AND WHISPERED "FIERCE"? USING THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME WAS MORE LIKE POOPING IN A PUBLIC TOILET. ON A SCALE OF ONE TO HORRENDOUS I WOULD GIVE IT ELEVEN MILLION STARS.  IM MAD!!!" arkhamsiren: "this is the best review of any product ever"#5 – Best Worst Mascara Review Ever
February 16th, 2013 at 12:15 pm by Michelle

Ever left your most prized, expensive mascara in the car overnight during the summer or winter? Similar effect…

 

Alicia Keys: "Seriously Kim and Kanye, you named her 'North'......? That's like me naming my kid 'Car'"#4 – Alicia Keys Blasts Kim & Kanye on Twitter
June 21st, 2013 at 5:43 pm by Mark

“North West” might be a cute and clever name for a baby, but only if your name is Kanye. Neither parent seems to care about the future chiding, “I went down south on North West,” when she’s in high school…

 

CVS Sale Tags: "Gatorade - Piss colored. Tastes like shit."  "CVS Lotion: It puts the lotion in the basket."#3 – CVS Sale Price Tags
June 28th, 2013 at 5:10 pm by Mark

I’ve spent a lot more time in CVS Pharmacy during the last year, and seen some rather interesting inventory tags which have really made me question the quality of CVS as a brand…

 

Stupid you are. Breed, you should not.#2 – Master Yoda Speaks About Breeding
May 13th, 2013 at 9:19 pm by Mark

Sounds like some people I know, and unfortunately, the damage is already done to their children, as well. At least I had the good sense to not

 

Caption: "Have fun cleaning this up :) Love you --- Daddy x x"  Ricky: "how is this possible?"  Poster: "Fill it up completely then flip it over and wipe up the water that spilled..."  Ricky: "thank you now im off to troll peeps"#1 – Trolling Win: The Glass of Water Trick
February 9th, 2013 at 5:54 pm by Mark

Sometimes, you get to troll a perfect audience…

 

Thanks, everyone, for reading, re-posting and sharing!

blogitude.com: A special Thank You to our loyal Readers, Stumblers, Facebookers and Pinners for a great 2012. WE WISH YOU A HAPPY AND PROPSPEROUS 2013! Our New Years resolution is to stop reusing the same image from last year and Photoshopping over it

Happy New Year 2013!

January 1st, 2013 at 1:45 pm by Mark
Tags: , , ,

It’s been another great year for blogitude.com! Today, we’d like to recap our top ten, most popular & most shared posts from 2012:

Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to "Unstable." ;)#10: Facebook Relationship Status
February 9th, 2012 at 12:12 pm by Mark

They really should implement this…

 

Please identify your sexual orientation: Bisexual, Gay Man, Gay Woman/Lesbian, Chinese, Heterosexual/Straight, Other#9: Questioning Your Sexual Orientation?
April 16th, 2012 at 5:43 pm by Mark

If you’re unclear about whether you’re homosexual or bisexual, this may help you. Perhaps you’re merely one of 1.34 billion Chinese.

 

Cat Facts Revenge#8: Evil Cellphone Tricks: Cat Facts Revenge
March 7th, 2012 at 5:49 pm by Mark

I didn’t think the Cat Facts prank could be usurped, but I was wrong.

 

Hey Pretty. Wanna date me?  Yes = Smile  No = Backflip#7: This Pickup Line Can’t Fail
March 23rd, 2012 at 5:20 pm by Mark

Although, the “backflip” in question will most probably be a back-handed, one-fingered salute…

 

Elmer Fudd, when confronted with Duck Face.#6: Speaking of Duckface Photos…
April 13th, 2012 at 5:53 pm by Mark

It’s not rabbit season … It’s duck season!

 

My view on dogs: Chihuahua, Beagle, Poodle, German Shepherd, Great Dane, Pit Bull.  My view on Cats: Cat, Cat, Cat, Cat, Cat, What da fuckkkkk?#5: The Difference Between Cats and Dogs
February 24th, 2012 at 5:44 pm by Mark

Yeah, I’m not much for cats, either. They give me gas.

But dogs don’t!

 

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why can't Paper do this to Scissors? Screw Scissors, why can't Paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook Paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because Paper can't beat anybody. A Rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play Rock Paper Scissors, I always choose Rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their Paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh sorry, I thought Paper would protect you.#4: How to Really Enjoy Rock-Paper-Scissors
June 14th, 2012 at 5:39 pm by Mark

Sometimes, you have to bend the rules.

 

Facebook Duck Hunting: Every time you see a girl doing the duck face in a photo, you comment "BANG!" Happy duck hunting :)#3: Open Season on Duckface Photos
April 13th, 2012 at 12:02 pm by Mark

If the meme isn’t enough for you, be sure to play the video game!

 

HOMEWORK: You are to assume the role of a Chinese immigrant in 1870 and write a letter home about your experiences.#2: Social Studies Win
March 12th, 2012 at 5:25 pm by Mark

I can’t find any fault at all with this one. In fact, it’s so brilliant, I’ll bet the teacher gave this kid an A — for Asshole!

 

IT'S A TRAP: "Son, I know you've grown up and I'm proud of you. When Ashley comes over tonight, if things get serious, make sure you're SAFE! Use this!  P.S. Your dinner is in the fridge honey. Love, Mom."#1: Safe Sex Fail
March 10th, 2012 at 5:24 pm by Mark

Apparently, Mom wants grandkids with Ashley…

 

Thanks, everyone, for reading, re-posting and sharing!

 

blogitude.com: A special Thank You to our loyal Readers, Stumblers, Facebookers and Pinners for a great 2012. WE WISH YOU A HAPPY AND PROPSPEROUS 2013! Our New Years resolution is to use more images of Hoss from Bonanza.

Stock Photos

Video of 76-Year-Old Plowing Through Supermarket

April 18th, 2012 at 5:26 pm by Mark
Tags: , , , , , , ,

At least ten people wish they’d not gone grocery shopping on Saturday, April 14th, 2012 at the Publix on Belle Terre Parkway in Palm Coast, Florida …

This week, the Florida Highway Patrol charged a 76-year-old woman, Thelma Wagenhoffer, with Careless Driving after she drove her 2004 Toyota Camry through the front door of the Publix supermaket on Saturday afternoon. Of the ten people injured, only two were injured seriously, and both are expected to make a full recovery. Hiring the best car accident lawyer is the answer to get the right compensation. On the other hand, lemon laws is the one who helps people in getting financial compensation due to defective cars.

Ten things strike me as miraculously amazing about this story in Florida:

And, the number one thing I’m miraculously amazed at:

[ Warning: Graphic video, but again, no deaths or critical injuries. ]

Note: Seriously, watching that baby carriage just before the impact freaked me out until I read a little. I’m just glad that no one was killed, as things definitely could’ve been far, far worse.