Posts Tagged with "new year"

Drink Too Much For New Years?

January 2nd, 2015 at 5:50 pm by Chered
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I’m not self-medicating with booze. The guy at the liquor store wrote me a prescription. Well, he called it a receipt… Whatever.

When You Get Wine Hangover, It's Called the Grape Depression

Happy New Year 2015!

January 1st, 2015 at 12:00 am by Mark
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Tonight, we celebrate the passing of a year. To some, it seems like forever. To others, it seems like no time at all.

For those still with us, we celebrate. For those no longer with us, we lament.

I wish you all safety and abundance.

Happy New Year.

Resolutions? My only resolution is 1920×1028.

My New Year's Resolution is 5760x1080

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The Year in Review: 2013

January 3rd, 2014 at 1:52 pm by Mark
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It’s been another great year for blogitude.com! Today, we’d like to recap our top ten, most popular & most shared posts from 2013:

Cassette Tape and a Bic Pen Have a Cigarette#10 – Age Test: Cassette Tape and a BIC Pen?
March 9th, 2013 at 5:38 pm by Mark

If you get this, it doesn’t mean you’re old. It just means you have a sick mind.

 

Shirt Tag: "100% Cotton, Machine Wash Cold. It's never so hot that you have to take off your shirt. Don't be that guy."#9 – Guys: It’s Never Too Hot to Take Off Your Shirt
July 8th, 2013 at 5:21 pm by Mark

According to most women, the only man allowed to take off his shirt at any given time is Channing Tatum.

 

I gained access to my friend's Facebook account. This was the only logical thing to do. Status: "I'm giving 10 bucks to the person who calls me with the best Chewbacca impression within the next 20 minutes. I expect the line will be busy, so don't linger when you call."#8 – Facebook Status Hack? Check. Phone Prank? Check.
March 10th, 2013 at 1:42 pm by Mark

This is the perfect time to perform the otherwise useless skill of yelling, “Dude! She called you a scruffy-looking nerf-herder!” in Shyriiwook.

 

Sign: "This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness." Grafitti: "NO WE WON'T"#7 – Stubborn Graffiti
April 18th, 2013 at 9:09 pm by Mark

Sounds like some women I know, too. 😉

 

Free Tattoo Removal - The Common Kitchen Grater#6 – Do-It-Yourself Tattoo Removal Kit
May 19th, 2013 at 5:34 pm by Mark

I’m not sure why I’ve had the sudden interest in bad tattoos lately. But for those in need, Amazon has a veritable treasure trove of tattoo removal gear to fit most every budget…

 

POST OF SHAME.  albinwonderland: "I'm really mad so lemme just put this psa out into the world. DO YOU SEE THIS MASCARA? THIS MASCARA IS CALLED MAYBELLINE THE ROCKET VOLUME EXPRESS. I WENT TO GO BUY MASCARA THE OTHER DAY AND THIS SHIT WAS ONE DOLLAR CHEAPER THAN MY USUAL MASCARA (rimmel sexy curves) SO I BOUGHT IT (because I'm a fool of a took) AND I COULD WRITE SONNETS ABOUT THE WAYS IN WHICH IT IS TERRIBLE. THE BRISTLES ARE ODDLY SHORT AND DON'T CATCH YOUR LASHES PROPERLY EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE RUBBER OR PLASTIC OR SOME PINE NEEDLE SHIT. IT CLUMPED ALL OF MY EYELASHES IMMIDIATELY UPON IMPACT AND THEY WOULDN'T SEPARATE EVEN USING AN EYELASH COMB. IT WOULD NOT COME OFF. AND NO IT IS NOT THE WATERPROOF KIND BECAUSE I CHECKED FOR THAT BEFORE AND AFTER BUYING IT. I USED MAKEUP REMOVER TWICE, CLEANSED MY FACE WITH THE STRENGTH OF GASTON, TONED LIKE OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN IN THE 80'S, AND STILL HAD OPAQUE BLACK STREAKS DOWN MY FACE. YOU KNOW HOW YOU BUY MASCARA AND YOU'RE SO EXCITED TO USE IT AND THEN THE FIRST TIME YOU DO IT'S LIKE THE HEAVENS OPEN UP AND LITTLE CHERUBS FLOAT DOWN FROM PEARLESCENT CLOUDS AND KISS YOUR EYELASHES GENTLY AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND THAT BEYONCE HERSELF HAS NODDED AT YOU AND WHISPERED "FIERCE"? USING THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME WAS MORE LIKE POOPING IN A PUBLIC TOILET. ON A SCALE OF ONE TO HORRENDOUS I WOULD GIVE IT ELEVEN MILLION STARS.  IM MAD!!!" arkhamsiren: "this is the best review of any product ever"#5 – Best Worst Mascara Review Ever
February 16th, 2013 at 12:15 pm by Michelle

Ever left your most prized, expensive mascara in the car overnight during the summer or winter? Similar effect…

 

Alicia Keys: "Seriously Kim and Kanye, you named her 'North'......? That's like me naming my kid 'Car'"#4 – Alicia Keys Blasts Kim & Kanye on Twitter
June 21st, 2013 at 5:43 pm by Mark

“North West” might be a cute and clever name for a baby, but only if your name is Kanye. Neither parent seems to care about the future chiding, “I went down south on North West,” when she’s in high school…

 

CVS Sale Tags: "Gatorade - Piss colored. Tastes like shit."  "CVS Lotion: It puts the lotion in the basket."#3 – CVS Sale Price Tags
June 28th, 2013 at 5:10 pm by Mark

I’ve spent a lot more time in CVS Pharmacy during the last year, and seen some rather interesting inventory tags which have really made me question the quality of CVS as a brand…

 

Stupid you are. Breed, you should not.#2 – Master Yoda Speaks About Breeding
May 13th, 2013 at 9:19 pm by Mark

Sounds like some people I know, and unfortunately, the damage is already done to their children, as well. At least I had the good sense to not

 

Caption: "Have fun cleaning this up :) Love you --- Daddy x x"  Ricky: "how is this possible?"  Poster: "Fill it up completely then flip it over and wipe up the water that spilled..."  Ricky: "thank you now im off to troll peeps"#1 – Trolling Win: The Glass of Water Trick
February 9th, 2013 at 5:54 pm by Mark

Sometimes, you get to troll a perfect audience…

 

Thanks, everyone, for reading, re-posting and sharing!

blogitude.com: A special Thank You to our loyal Readers, Stumblers, Facebookers and Pinners for a great 2012. WE WISH YOU A HAPPY AND PROPSPEROUS 2013! Our New Years resolution is to stop reusing the same image from last year and Photoshopping over it

Happy New Year!

January 1st, 2014 at 12:00 pm by Mark
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For those who feel nostalgic…

RIP 2013: 2013-2013

I, for one, don’t. 😉

Happy New Year!

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

New Years Eve 2013

December 31st, 2013 at 7:35 pm by Mark
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blogitude.com wishes everyone a Happy and Safe New Years Eve celebration! Be extremely safe, in fact — don’t drink and drive!

And when you’re making resolutions, or making wishes, be careful what you ask for. 😉

Facebook Status: "Takin Applications for a midnight kiss. Send picture of lips."  Answer 1: (Rocky Horror screenshot with Dr. Frank-N-Furter) Answer 2: "Lol priceless"  Answer 3: "U want mustache in the pic or not"