Marketing is all about getting butts in seats to listen to the message, but this racist Subway ad goes way too far.

Reading through my Facebook feed I came across the post, “Most people don’t realize this, but you can eat Organic, gluten-free foods without telling everyone about it…”

That’s when I started thinking, “How self-righteous do you have to be to really post crap about your diet into a social media page?” That’s when I realized the better question was “Who in their right mind would actually comment on such irrelevant garbage?”

I came to the realization that these people really do care about what they are posting, but what they don’t realize is that they are sending out a message loud and clear, “I am a self-righteous cunt of an individual who has no idea of how stupid I appear to be. Moreover, I am not to be trusted, as I have poor judgment in matters of what is public information and private information. I cannot tell the difference and therefore should not be trusted with authority, responsibility, and the like. I should not be allowed to breed. I should be forced into an internment camp where I am force-fed pasteurized cheese products, gmo corn, and other foods I deem beneath me. I became a member of the populace merely by luck and luck alone. For crying out loud, Darwin is rolling in his grave.”

This is not to say that a nice dinner couldn’t be shared with friends, recipes exchanged, and perhaps a later dinner invitation. However, this self-righteous hippie garbage of “look at how good I am to my body” and self-promotion without a purpose must stop. After all, a few phone calls to friends and family or perhaps an honest to god written letter would suffice. This has no place on the internet as no one outside of that specific group of other self-righteous individuals really gives a shit. After all, in truth this cannot have been a foodgasmic experience, as there is no implication of a couple or more people involved. To my knowledge, this was only one, organically enhanced and probably radioactive individual in society who decided that broadcasting this into the Facebook universe was a new and exciting idea. In reality, this move is about as exciting as doing an internet search for the word poop.

With that in mind, here are a few posting guidelines for future reference:

1. Is the news I have really interesting?
   If not, don’t post it.
2. Is this something that really needs to be shared with everyone?
   If not, share it only to the people who might actually give a shit.
3. Is this more interesting that a political scandal where someone gave a blowjob to a politician, wearing a clown suit with a steel marital aid hanging out of their rectum?
   Then see number 1.
4. Get a life.

So eat your self-righteous food, take a shit, take a picture, then blog the picture and see if anyone can tell if said shit has a smell. I bet the answer is yes, and you will still have more friends on Facebook than Nickelback. Your shit does not smell any different, so cut the shit. Get on with what semblance of a weeny life you have and enjoy what you can.

Note: This post was powered by: Benson and Hedges, Evan Williams Sour Mash Whiskey, and the Writing Staff of Blogitude.com.

Today is November the 2st 2010…  The day many Americans will go to the polls… 

People make WAY too big a deal about it and are generally too uptight about the entire subject.

I was reading a post from the Knoxville News Sentinel where it chronicled all of the violence and fraud surrounding voting thus far out of pure boredom.  During this reading I found that not only had fraud taken place already but it backfired in atleast one case where the silly Democrats in charge had the polls set up so the voting populace could vote for only a Republican option.  You would think that if you were going to screw with an election you would set it up to choose a candidate who personified your own views.  Guess thats what happens when you can’t trust a member of your own party, but Harry Reid?  Come on now, we as a populace can do better than that.

Of course there was also a man had shouted “You lie!” toward President Obama. Last but not least, there were the usual numerous cases of absentee ballet fraud, like Chicago during the 1920′s. Vote early, vote often!

Generally, I would say that this should really be covered under the entertainment section of the paper as a good deal of it is quite humorous.  It is after all a civic duty so must be given a little pomp and circumstance and should be documented as such.

Honestly, I don’t care if you vote or not.  If you do make the choice to do so, make a decision you think is livable.  If you stay home, that’s great too. But then you lose the ability complain when you get the perverbial shaft because you were lazy.  So enjoy your trip or not.  But be nice to one another in the process.   After all, elected officials are supposed to be the best and brightest we have to offer.  No wonder the city, state, and country is headed for the toilet.

Sometimes you feel like: