For all of the comic book-addicted 40 year olds out there in Internet land, it’s wise to remember that Eating is not considered a super power.

I’m simply amazed at what’s considered “fat” and, conversely, what so many consider “attractive,” and it seems to be Women leading the charge these days. I simply cannot comprehend how anyone can find a gaunt, malnourished stick figure with a bitchy attitude attractive.

Nearly fifty percent of all marriages in the US end in divorce, according to 2009 statistics provided by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD). Comparatively (in an apples and oranges sort of way), the OECD reports that 30.6% of Americans are obese.

Conversely, these study’s Administrators largely consisted of short, fat, balding European accountants — overwhelmingly Caucasian males — who possess only a tenuous grasp of both common sense and the society around them, and have almost no chance of ever getting laid without money changing hands.