Lame Things I’ve Heard

May 18th, 2007 at 10:42 am by Diva
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Okay. By now, we all know I am a big mouth girl, with an even bigger personality and a colossus opinion about most everything. So, it seems that lately, I’ve had plenty of time to sit back, watch and listen. And some of the things I have heard recently make me want to say, “Um. What?!?!?! Get a grip, you ditz!” This is merely one of them.

***You don’t like me because I’m fat, huh?***

During a discussion about male/female carrying ons, a male friend of mine, Spike*, told me that some girl had said this one to him because he wasn’t paying her the attention she felt like she deserved or wanted.

Oh, please, honey!

Will somebody please explain to me how women figure that if a man is not paying attention to them, or not “liking” them, or not fawning over them, then it’s surely because of that big ass attached to their backside???

First off, I wonder if she ever stopped to think, if a brother isn’t giving her skins, that maybe it’s not her fat butt… maybe it’s the beautiful personality that she displays constantly… You know, the personality that rivals Peyton Manning’s dripping wet sweat sock midway through the 4th quarter of the Superbowl?

B- What man is going to want you when you are oozing ickee-ness all over the bar, grocery store, or library by hitting on and trying to make out with anything and everything with a penis? Seriously, if I was a dude, and I saw a girl (any girl) hitting on one guy, getting the boot, then hitting on the next guy, getting the boot, then hitting on the next guy, getting the boot… I’m not so sure I’d be into her either. That’s just icky.

Thirdly and lastly (as if I don’t wrap it up here, I may keep going on and on)- Diva isn’t exactly a petite, Barbie doll sized girl of perfection.  Now Diva knows that, although men do dig up on the arm candy, they also love women who will laugh with them, talk to them and have a great time doing whatever it is they are doing. Diva does not, nor has she ever, suffered from lack of attention from the opposite sex. Because regardless of the size of her blue jeans, Diva has no lack of esteem.


It’s a little thing called self-confidence, sister. You might try looking that one up and studying on it for a minute.

Yup, yup. You don’t dig me because I’m fat…..That’s one of the lamest things I think I’ve ever heard.

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent AND the guilty.

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5 Responses to “Lame Things I’ve Heard”

  1. chattiekat Says:

    You go, girl! I absolutely love that self-esteem of yours! It’s a shame that more women don’t see themselves the way you do – as beautiful women, regardless of their sizes!

  2. Kevin Scott Says:

    I don’t like this article ’cause it’s fat.

  3. John Kaiser Says:

    I once got set up with a girl I never saw threw a friend who hadn’t seen the girl in a long time. Well we talked on the phone first and all went well, and then when we met it turned out she had completely lied about her appearance (height, weight, hair color, everything). Suffice it to say I was quite angry that I as lied to. She replied with indignation when I told her I was going to leave the room, “You just don’t like me because I am fat!” I turned around and said, “No. I don’t like you because you are an insecure liar.” Looking back I guess I could have been gentler.

  4. Spike Says:

    I must thank you for understanding what was very clearly an uncomfortable situation. It wasn’t as much a case of my wanting to tell her, “Yes, I think you’re a cow!” so much as the simple fact that self-deprecation is so obvious NOT sexy … all of her acting like a rabid warthog in heat aside. *ahem*


  5. Hazel Says:

    I Love this entry! Desperation is the biggest turn off imo. A big juicy ass? Nothin’ wrong with a bit of curve and bounce. Yeah its true I’ve got butt envy and I am pretty sure lots of folks appreciate a bouncy butt over a skanky one.