After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.						
					 
        
                
                        
                                
January 22nd, 2013 at 7:07 pm by Mark
Tags: marijuana, sarcasm, twinkies, weed
				
	“Man, I wish I had a Twinkie,” someone mentioned earlier today.  “Don’t you wish Twinkies were still around?”  
“Meh,” I muttered.  “I don’t really care for sweets, and I don’t smoke weed.”

 
		
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January 21st, 2013 at 5:40 pm by Mark
Tags: bruce almighty, chinese, eminem, english, movies, tattoos
				
	Again, we see English words used as a design element… in this case, the lyrics to a popular Eminem song.  This is, however, not unlike the American idiot with, “I’m a sweet little prostitute,” tattooed on his arm in Chinese because he thought it said, “Fierce warrior.”

 
		
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January 20th, 2013 at 9:33 pm by Mark
Tags: cats, lolcats
				
	Once upon a time, I had a cat who was so rambunctious he was neutered and de-clawed fifteen years ago.

 
		
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January 19th, 2013 at 9:50 pm by Mark
Tags: erectile dysfunction, football, kids, media, parenting
				
	There’s just nothing like being asked, “Did they say erectile dysfunction? What are they talking about?” by a five-year-old.  Thank you, NFL Football!

 
		
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January 18th, 2013 at 7:16 pm by Mark
Tags: conspiracy-theory, tinfoil hats
				
	If you’re now worried terrified about your Cats being spies for the Government, have no fear … The Academy of Conspiracy Theorists can help!

 
		
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