After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnet™ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.
As the November 13th, 2012 release of Call of Duty: Black Ops II nears, analysts are hopeful about the sudden stimulation in late night consumer retail spending. Not since 2009 has there been such an anticipated video game release, which is assured to cause the Obama camp to issue a statement taking credit for the slight economic upturn.
Many Analysts, however, urge vigilance, as news of an additional rash of unemployment is expected to follow on November 15th, 2012.
Imagine how easy it would be to dress yourself if you had no perception of color. Orange slacks and a green shirt? No problem. Rubik’s cube? Solved in one, simple move…
“Oh, you have a scrape on your knee? Well, under Obamacare, then you have to give me two ice creams a month for me to put a Band-Aid and some Neosporin on it. If you don’t have two ice creams, then we’re gonna make the store give them to you, and you have to give them to me for your Band-Aid.”
