Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

Ever Think You Might Have Super Powers?

August 7th, 2012 at 5:36 pm by Mark
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For all of the comic book-addicted 40 year olds out there in Internet land, it’s wise to remember that Eating is not considered a super power.

Would You Like Ice With That?

August 6th, 2012 at 5:39 pm by Mark
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The Ice Cube dispenser was just as amusing

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How Do You Like Your Tea?

August 6th, 2012 at 5:38 pm by Mark
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If you were looking for Sweet Ice T, forget about it.

Woman Busted for Offering Sex for McNuggets

August 4th, 2012 at 5:03 pm by Mark
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I’ll bet she wanted a Big Mac, too. Supersize it!

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Pregnancy Workout for Friday…

August 3rd, 2012 at 5:08 pm by Mark
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Well, isn’t that a lovely way to spend a Friday night?