Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

Darth Vader in Love

February 17th, 2014 at 5:58 pm by Mark
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Dating is a pain in the ass even if you’re *not* an evil, Dark Lord of the Sith.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0X9NFknjTRE

Olympic Skiers Attacked by AT-AT Walkers

February 17th, 2014 at 3:04 pm by Mark
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At this point, anything would make the Olympics more interesting. Next up? R2 Curling…

Tip: Video courtesy of TV2 Denmark’s show, Night Shift with Anders Breinholt

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The Walking Dead: Return of Judith

February 16th, 2014 at 9:32 pm by Mark
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So the biggest open question since the mid-season break of The Walking Dead has been answered: baby Judith is alive. But for how long, considering Tyreese’s poor choice in Au Pair?

Judith Grimes: "Sure, I'll quit crying as soon as I have your assurance that crazy Lizzie isn't gonna try and strangle me in my sleep."

Walking Dead: Rick vs. Carl

February 16th, 2014 at 7:04 pm by Mark
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Unfortunately, as we saw in the last episode, Rick’s son Carl only has about 30% accuracy while consistently aiming at the sky…

Rick Grimes: "No Matter How Much I Point This at the Ground, I Can Still Shoot Walkers"

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

Keep Calm: Shaun of the Dead Edition

February 16th, 2014 at 5:40 pm by Mark
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As many consider Shaun of the Dead to be pure genius in the Zombie-Comedy genre, there’s also the more obscure Cuban-based film, Juan of the Dead, which is equally hilarious.

Keep Calm, Take Car, Go to Mum's, Kill Phillip (Sorry!), Grab Liz, Go to the Winchester, Have a nice cold pint, and Wait for All This to Blow Over