I can remember back on November 18th, 1978, sitting in the living room floor watching the Star Wars Holiday Special on WBIR Channel 10, then Knoxville’s CBS affiliate (they’re NBC now). I was already a serious Star Wars fan, having seen it at the drive-in the year before, in the theaters a few times that summer, and having spent a year’s worth of allowance on bubble-gum cards and comic books.
I also remember how boring the show was to me, how horrible all of the familiar cameos were (“Maude is a bartender?”).
With good reason, the show was never aired again, surviving only as a multi-generation VHS dub… but, hardcore fans will pay good money to get a copy, regardless.
Still, there’s some nostalgia there. Remembering that old TV with the rabbit-ear antenna, sitting on the rug in the middle of the living room floor.
If I say “liberal groups,” most people have an idea what I mean. They are groups who adamantly seek reformation in laws regarding their cause, play watchdog to private sector businesses and individuals, and may even have a radical section who choose to reform people by harrassment or violence.
If I say “conservative groups,” most people have an idea what I mean, as well. They are groups who protest change, organize protests, and may even have a radical section who choose to reform people by harrassment or violence.
It is for the latter problem in set of groups why I choose not to align myself with any “group.”
The terms “Liberal” and “Conservative” with regards to political parties came in their interpretations of our Constitution. Liberals believe that the Constitution is dynamic, and that it should be updated. Conservatives believe that the document should be preserved, and that it says what it says.
These terms have little or nothing to do with “Democrat” or “Republican.” Either can be Liberal or Conservative, and even liberal or conversative. There can be conservative Democrats who are Conservatives. There can be liberal Republicans who are Liberals. And any mixture in between.
It’s all twisted. Considering the twists on both sides, polarizing everything just makes it worse.
It’s been an interesting few days, and Halloween seemed just the sort of time to make fun of it.
The infamous Kerry comments were as follows:
Your education, If you make the most of it, you study hard, and you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.
Ummm… If a=b and b=c, then a=c (purty damn gud algebry for a public skool boy frum Tennessee, ain’t it?)… Then…
John Kerry said Iraq was another Vietnam.
John Kerry went on relentlessly about his service in Vietnam.
Therefore…
John Kerry didn’t make the most of it, study hard, do his homework or make an effort.
Thus we know the absolute truth: It wasn’t a NeoCon, Right Wing Conspiracy that caused Kerry to lose the election — it’s because he was a dumbass!
Unlike our troops, who know the value of good humor:
It’s time to bid a fond farewell to a favorite, formerly famous, front-yard fowl. Alas, the Pink Flamingo is no more, dead at a mere forty-nine years of age.
Union Products, of Leominster, Mass., has finally given up production of these unsightly eyesores due to financial problems.
Robert Thompson, professor of popular culture at Syracuse University, paid tribute to the infamous bird that has been immortalized everywhere — from the John Waters’ movie Pink Flamingos, to bachelor parties and lawns across America.
“Let’s face it,” he said. “As iconic emblems of kitsch, there are two pillars of cheesy, campyness in the American pantheon. One is the velvet Elvis. The other is the pink flamingo.”
The birth of the plastic pink flamingo in 1957 coincided with the booming interest in Florida, Thompson said, making it possible for those in other parts of the country to have a little piece of the Sunshine State’s mystique in their yard.
By the late ’70s, according to Thompson, the pink flamingo became a symbol of bad taste. It was considered trash culture and embraced by folks with a wise-guy attitude. They knew better (wink, wink) but embraced the iconic symbol anyway.
By the late ’80s and early ’90s, he said we learned to make fun of pop culture items such as the pink flamingo as well as appreciate them.
“The pink flamingo has gone from a piece of the Florida boom and Florida exotica to being a symbol of trash culture to now becoming a combination of all we know — kitsch, history, simplicity and elegance,” Thompson said.
Until recently, Mike Smollon was one of the folks who put the pink flamingo in the kitsch category.
But during a recent trip to Massachusetts, the Boynton Beach firefighter and battalion chief had an epiphany.
After reading a story in the Sentinel & Enterprise (Fitchburg, Mass.) about the closing of the factory, he bought 12 pairs of flamingos.
“I never owned a pink flamingo before,” Smollon said. “To be honest, I used to think this was the kind of a thing only a girl would put in her yard. But when I found out the factory was closing, I thought this is something historical happening.”
Smollon went to the factory and bought 11 sets of pink flamingos and one set of the commemorative gold flamingos that were made for 2007, which would have been the bird’s 50th birthday. He plans to keep a few and give the rest to flamingo-loving friends.
Flamingo fever hit and he searched the Internet for Don Featherstone, the kitchy bird’s creator. When he learned that Featherstone lived only about five minutes from his hotel, he called him and asked if he could come over and get his photograph taken with him.
Not only did Featherstone and his wife, Nancy, come out of the house wearing matching pink shirts adored with green flamingos, the artist autographed two sets of flamingos. Smollon also bought a copy of Featherstone’s book, The Original Pink Flamingos: Splendor on the Grass (Schiffer Publishing, 1999), which he autographed for an extra $5.
After Smollon returned home, he bought a set of pink flamingos from the 1950s for $39 on eBay.
“Now I have one of the first sets made and one of the last sets made,” he said. “I have my own private collection.”
Of course, it’s lived a full life at only 49, growing from an Annoying Adornment to the King of Kitsch.
Don’t forget to check out the Mockumentary, “The Pink Flamingo: Ambassador of the American Lawn.”
