After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnet™ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.
April 11th, 2012 at 5:05 pm by Mark
Tags: cellphones, friday, humor, jealousy, love, men, relationships, women
She’s understandably angry, given that some random friend, or perhaps even a family member, liked her man’s Facebook status. Yeah… Is anyone else hearing Joi scream, “You ain’t got to lie, Craig! You ain’t got to lie!” or is it just me?
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April 10th, 2012 at 5:27 pm by Mark
Tags: cartoon, clothes, homeless, lady gaga, orlando bloom, quotes, twitter
Contrary to popular belief, it was not Orlando Bloom’s Twitter with the quote:
I think Lady Gaga just puts glue on herself and rolls around on random things.
The Twitter account which reportedly posted it in January 2012 is an Orlando Bloom spoof/fan account, thus its repeated mis-attribution to good ol’ Legolas. I managed to find the same quip on a greeting card dated April 5th, 2011, so it’s certainly been out there a while. Regardless of the source, it’s still funny, considering…
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April 9th, 2012 at 5:07 pm by Mark
Tags: innuendo, toys, wolverine
The inflatable Wolverine Punching Bag is a must-have item. Wolverine says, “Blow me, Bub.”
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April 8th, 2012 at 5:48 pm by Mark
Tags: food, meat, sarcasm, vegetarians
Speaking of beef ribs … Have a nice day!
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April 8th, 2012 at 5:36 pm by Mark
Tags: barbeque, cellphones, fail, food, meat, racism
This Easter Sunday, given the lovely weather, was a great day to fire up the grill! Of course, we stuck with beef ribs…
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