Yes, as seen on morning, daytime and nightly television, it’s the FABULOUS, HIGHLY SOUGHT AFTER Balloon Boy costume, just in time for Halloween!

The gondola is a semi-scale precision laser cut unit that attaches to the bottom of Plantraco’s 38″ metallized nylon flying saucer balloon. It has the same chance of lifting your 6-year old as the one you may have seen on CNN or MSNBC TV. So don’t call the national guard or you might get yourself in a bit of trouble eh? It’s a bit smaller, but we are certain you can still fool CNN’s Wolf Blitzer for a long while to come! That’s whatcha call quality investigative journalism right? Right!

     Of course, it doesn’t take much to fool monotonous mediatard Wolf Blitzer, the man who singlehandedly caused the shooting death of FBI Agent Linda Franklin on October 14th, 2002 by going on television to goad and belittle the then-famous, and media-addicted, Beltway Sniper with statements like, “You’re not a real sniper!  A real sniper would make head shots!”  Agent Franklin was, of course, fatally shot in the head only hours later, as she left a DC-Area Home Depot.

     The fact that this asshat is still on television grates my nerves.

     Well, that, and every other ridiculously speculative, non-story they re-air every fifteen minutes… Oh, like how they accused security guard Richard Jewell of trying to blow up Olympic Centennial Park… or … Balloon Boy…

Tip: Okay, Anton sent the lin to the Halloween Costume, which is brilliant.  But seeing Wolf Blitzer’s name in print just pissed me off…

     After multiple issues after a year and a half, I finally talked a vendor into replacing a temperamental server that’d been causing a one of my clients no end of fits.  And so, at 5AM Tuesday morning, the hard drives were pulled and installed in a brand-spanking-new server.  Miraculously, everything worked.  Or so I thought…

     At 5PM yesterday, I was notified by my customer that, “Our mail server has been down all day.”  I’m not sure why they didn’t contact me about it earlier in the day, but… Further inspection of the server log revealed the following actual error message:

Oct 20 05:53:12 antarctica dovecot: Time just moved backwards by 7307 seconds. This might cause a lot of problems, so I’ll just kill myself now.

     It seems that that when the new server rebooted and went through its normal bit of resetting the time, the mailserver died.  However, since this is the actual error message, as listed in the maillog, it is apparent that their mail server has developed a personality.
     Given its new-found malcontentment and predeliction to suicide, I couldn’t help but think perhaps it needs a companion… I know the perfect one…

     And on that note, I’m going revert to “couch potato” mode and watch Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy…

     We ignored it when the British childrens’ show Rainbow taught such habits…

     But as time progressed, they strayed from innuendo…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWIlBqUNbZU

     Alas, now the problem seems to have crossed into our borders.  Even our beloved Sesame Street has become a refuge for such perversion…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQgB4424SIM

     Sick and twisted, all of it!  And I, for one, intend to do all I can to draw attention this sort of rampant sexual innuendo!

Note: Hat tip to Anton Olsen for his dilligence in bringing this matter to my attention.

     Last night, there was a party I didn’t bother to attend, as I only seem to get in trouble when I hang out with them, anyway.  But, from most accounts, it was a pretty good party.
     Apparently, someone really liked a friend of mine, and instead of mentioning it, decided to be a wallflower, and wait until today to ask.
     “Would you have danced with me last night if I asked you to?”

     It’s been a long time, but  I remember girls asking things like that in high school.  They were young, hadn’t come into their own, and lacked the self-esteem to just walk up and say, “Hey, wanna dance?” “We should go out some time,” or “Here’s my phone number.”
     Even worse were the silly, self-doubting, unsure questions after “hanging out” somewhere.  Things like, “Would you have kissed me last night?”
     For me, even though I was the same age, the answer was always, “No.  You’re too young.”
     Honestly, that probably didn’t help their self-esteem either, but nobody’s ever called me on it, and I did try and explain myself.  Although I probably could have explained it better, I wasn’t trying to hurt their feelings.  It was just that, for a lot of reasons other than making out, I had very little in common with them, and I simply wasn’t interested.

     I think that’s pretty much how my friend felt this afternoon, when replying, “No, you’re not mature enough.”

     I certainly hope her answer didn’t hurt his little high-school-girl feelings.  I mean, with that much self-doubt and low self-esteem, a rejection like that might throw his damn-near-forty-years-old psyche directly into a mid-life crisis, thus destroying the mood for his Monday Manicure…

     Former Senator and Presidential Hopeful John McCain’s 24-year-old daughter Meghan posted this photo on Twitter, with much rebuke.

     Interestingly, if you look close enough, you can see a book called “Andy Warhol.”

     I’d only add the following disclaimer…

WARNING:  OBJECTS IN WEBCAM ARE
SMALLER THAN THEY APPEAR.

     Seriously, what the Hell is everyone bitching about?  I’ve seen more risque images on the Country Music Awards, for chrissakes, and nobody bitches about that… and she’s at least OF LEGAL AGE, unlike half the girls these friggin’ Internet pervs lust after (sick bastards should all be shot!).

     For further entertainment, check out her article about the whole sordid ordeal.

UPDATE 10/17/2009 @ 1:29AM US/EASTERN

     This just in from Fracas…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mL_m81PNBXc

     Although, the video would have been funnier if he’d glammed it up a bit and cried…

Tip: Kudos to Fracas for keeping me informed