When cooking, I think the best alternative to nuts is sanity.

You know some people just have the “Baby on Board” sign to give them an excuse to drive badly.

Of course, it’s completely within the realm of possibility that Jenny might enjoy that sort of thing … I’m just sayin’ …

I’m not sure that anyone would use a lotion from anyone named Buffalo Bill, and even less so when they bear the instructions of Jame Gumb from Silence of the Lambs…

The wife had no idea what she was in for…