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Star Wars Femtroopers – The Controversey Continues

September 8th, 2006 at 12:51 pm by Mark
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     Considering I’m a Star Wars dork (but having a life and personality without making constant references to it like some people), a friend of my sent me a great link today (Les Jones site)…

Femtrooper

     Further investigation revealed that there are approximately thirty Femtroopers in the world today, mostly in the United States (thanks to SithVixen for the scoop).
     Peter Hartlaub, at The San Francisco Bay Culture Blog, had a recent entry about the phenomenon.

This is perhaps the most celebratory development for horny Star Wars fans since Princess Leia became Jabba the Hutt’s barge ho.

I think these photos are really hot, but maybe that’s because I’ve seen “The Empire Strikes Back” at least 25 times and own a George Lucas action figure. While the armored hot pants and bare midriff are both nice touches, the contoured breast plate is definitely the sexiest/funniest part of the costume.

     Unfortunately, some people just don’t get it.  A comment on that site, written by someone known only as bagdorka, reads:

You know, I’m all for the armor… But, sorry to say, it’s not the real deal until they are sporting hairstyle-compatible demi-helms that cover their faces. The true star wars geek wants to hear it through the speakers, if you know what I’m saying. 

     *ahem*  Yeah, ok.  Taking this stuff a little too seriously?

     And TK5528 at the UK Garrison of the 501st Stormtrooper Legion seems to agree:

The “femtrooper thing” is strictly not permitted in the UK Garrison.

Besides, we in the UKG only do canon costumes in regards to Star Wars, and IMHO, femtroopers have very little to do with Star Wars.

     *cough*  And somehow spending seven hundred (or more) pounds for a Stormtrooper outfit, going to a London Convention Center and trying to drink Guinness and Whitbread through your helmet does have something to do with Star Wars…?

     Barry, a reader on the Les Jones site, had the following comment:

Well, it does inspire a new saying – “As useless as a codpiece on a femtrooper”

     *Ding!*  *Ding!* *Ding!*  Finally, we have a winner!  Nice one, Barry.  😉

     Les Jones writes:

Femtroopers – Feminine versions of Star Wars stormtroopers, the better to hookup at DragonCon with.
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Natural environment – the hotel and/or convention center

Favorite put-down – aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?

     I would venture to say they get plenty of dork-lines, as well, such as, “Hey, baby, are those things real?”
     Then again, I can also imagine them waving their hand, and saying, “These are not the breasts you’re looking for.”

Speaking of Dorks…

July 26th, 2007 at 10:27 am by Mark
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     Yeah, even though I’ve always enjoyed Star Wars, I’ve always been amazed at how far some people would take their fandom.  And this movie looks bloody hilarious:

     “Captain Picard is not gay … he’s BRITISH!”

     [ Mark tries desperately to bite his tongue … and succeeds 😉 ]

     Maybe it’s just me … but the whole Star Wars vs. Star Trek rivalry is completely laughable … 😉

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Search Engine Craziness

November 2nd, 2006 at 2:00 am by Mark
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     A couple of times a week, I check out the statistics on this site … the number of visitor sessions, number of pages they viewed, referrers, and, of course, search engine search terms that brought people here.

     I can understand getting a lot of hits for some of the things we’ve written about on here over the years.  Sure, Bai Ling, Femtroopers, Antidisestablishmentarians, psychos and even ex-girlfriends, you know… the usual fodder.
     Still, one of the most commonly used search terms — to the tune of several thousand a week in different variations — are graphic terms for bestiality with sheep, which amusingly end up at the old article about Grant Gillon

     Sometimes, however, I get really weird search terms, that multiple people have searched for… Like the fourty-three sessions:

why do rottweilers bit womens breasts

     Sure enough, there we are on Google’s #15.  That’s just crazy!

     Then there’re these twenty-four sessions…

personal ads rottweiler daughter private investigator

     Even higher, we’re at Google’s #3.  Who knew?

     And thirteen gems like this:

what percent of women think their house is haunted

     Yeah, we get Google’s #8 on that search. 

     Really, it blows my mind sometimes.