This one also knows when you’re lying.

     When Diva and Tony tied the knot in September, I couldn’t help but remark at the one photo which really stood out:

     “…from the looks of it, Tony is actually able to handle her.”

     But this post has absolutely nothing to do with that.

     Well…

     Other than a wedding.

     Earlier this week in India, a deeply superstitious farmhand was married, as well.  In fact, Mr. P. Selvakumar has finally found his perfect bitch.

     He says he was “cursed” after killing a couple of canines, and hopes this action will help lift it.

     Me, I’ll just sit back and laugh with a Top 10 list:

1. She’s on his crotch as soon as he walks in the door!
2. She can smell a rat a mile away!
3. He really keeps her on a short leash…
4. When she gets pissed, she’s absolutely rabid!
5. He’ll be in the dog house for the rest of his life.
6. Well, isn’t she just the pick of the litter?
7. Bet they’ll make some beautiful pups.
8. She lies like a dog!
9. Wonder if she likes it doggy-style?
10. Truly, this man knows how to handle his bitch.

     Man, you just can’t make stuff like this up…

Note: Selvakumar Photo Copyright © 2007 Associated Press, All Rights Reserved

“I’d ask the Minister whether … it’s appropriate in this case for a woman’s body parts to be inserted into a sheep when that’s normally been the domain of Tory males…”
— Grant Gillon, Alliance MP, New Zealand Parliament

     It was a serious day in Parliament on July 4th. One can imagine that the conversation regarding the cloning of human organs would have been rather dry had it not been for Alliance MP Grant Gillon, who delivered one of the best one liners NZ Parliament has seen in a good while.
     Most every Kiwi will agree that they’ve made a similar joke at least once in their lives. New Zealand’s media has made a farce of the situation, most notably TV3 and their coverage of the incident. Apparently, some people both in and out of Parliament are less than impressed, taking stances against “moral outrage” rather than having a laugh.

     Gillon rescinded the statement immediately and apologised for the joke, but this isn’t good enough for some MPs who seem more intent on continuing the mudslinging of late (not to mention the outrageous cries for “accountability”) rather than doing anything for the common good.
     Former Prime Minister Jenny Shipley seemed the most outraged at Gillon’s comment as she was interviewed by TV3. After first attacking Gillon’s behaviour she went on to explain her disdain, saying that “bestiality” is “pornographic,” and that this sort of behaviour, besides being illegal, was “intolerable.” Her language and use of pronouns made it unclear what, specifically, was illegal — the joke itself, making a joke in Parliament or buggering sheep.

     As if that weren’t ludicrous enough, other media reports have been offered regarding Gillon’s statements as being “sexist.”
     In defence of local media however, there was a later report that more than twenty years ago Gillon made a “sexist” statement in Parliament. Unfortunately, that was the entirety of the report, and it fails to elaborate the least bit. We are all left to wonder whether he did something direct like calling an up-and-coming Women’s activist a “bitch,” or whether he humorously vocalised his disdain at having Tampon commercials broadcasted during televised Rugby games.

     One has to wonder about peoples’ inability to take what Gillon said as the joke that it obviously was. Perhaps the ones most argumentative about it possess a guilty conscience.

     But someone said the comment was sexist…?

     Ok, fine… Maybe it’s not just the guys doing it…

Note: author of cartoon cannot be found, or s/he’d have credit.