American Flag: $24.99
Gasoline: $5.32
Cigarette Lighter: $2.50
Catching Yourself on Fire Because You’re a Flag-Burning Asshat?
PRICELESS
Six years ago today, I was living in a wannabe-First-World country that finally made me realize, “Hey, this place is more f&*$ed up than a Football bat!” After a couple of lengthy discussions, a bit of screaming, sporadic violence and some careful planning, I decided to come back to the United States after a three year absence.
To everyone who says, “Oh, the [insert some random country’s pathetic, government-provided excuse for a public solution] system is so much better in [insert some random country] than here in the US!” I would only say one thing:
Move there and find out what it’s really like compared to here, instead of believing some fairy-tale novella written by some asshat academic who’s never stepped foot in the country he adores above his own.
When it comes right down to it, the hard truth is that we get to enjoy the fruits of our labors, enjoying the best of most everything, whereas other countries export it for the good of their GDP.
Never forget what happened six years ago today.
Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.
I got this comment, and thought, “Hey, why not make this asshat famous? He’s almost as cool as Joseph Ferrante!”
mullah cimoc | shirin_hassan77@yahoo.com | IP: 67.166.109.28
mullah cimoc say paris hilton the good and the courage. him not run away, but go to jail. this calld the charcter.
she the beautifuyl and the natural and having so many baby in future to be good wife and mother.
but lesbian ameriki and lesbian ameriki mans hating her for natural the beauty and normal liking the boy.
ameriki so wicked and hate the woman unless she killing the baby and liking the lesbian.
in waziristan this not happen. father him not allow anyone hurting him daughter. taking the “special measure”. but ameriki so tame now. no respect for self.
in waziristan whole clan attacking this wicked judge and destroy, and also destry him entire family, to include even the second cousin. and burn with fire. and all grave of ancestor destroy and give bone for dog.
hypocrite liar ameriki say him “free” the womans but in true..ameriki woman the whore with LBT (low back tattoo) and hate husband. only free to having the abortion kill bnaby , to being slut and bad wife not cooking.
so soon all ameriki need make freedom and destroy controlling of usa by masters in tel aviv through spy in white house and pentagon.for him true and good info: stop1984now@yahoo.com
If you look around the ‘net, you’ll find all sorts of garbage like that from Mullah Comic … errr, Mullah Cimoc, rather.
Dude, yer not funny. Really. Stop it.
Besides, I still know several women with LBT’s who are pretty good cooks, although, I don’t know of any like that from where you are in Utah (which is a long way from Waziristan, Pakistan, last I checked). Regardless, when they’re not cooking, at least their husbands have something to aim at…
Last week, I inherited a website maintenance customer from a partner company. After getting everything working on Wednesday afternoon with the Indexer team, I sat back and waiting until the next time they’d call.
On Thursday, I was forwarded an e-mail saying there was an additional issue with their site. I looked at the file dates, and of course, one of the files in their e-Commerce software had been modified at 9:03AM on 19-Apr-2007. I rebuilt the file, inserted the requisite variables, and called the customer.
“No, I haven’t been in it,” he said. “I just got this stuff yesterday.”
Clearly, someone had. The site worked perfectly fine when I left it on Wednesday. Regardless, I took his explanation, and asked that he setup an account with us.
“No, all this stuff should be part of the Setup,” he monotoned. “My wife does all of the billing, anyway.” Eventually, he promised to have her called me on Friday, 20-Apr-2007.
Friday came and went without a phone call.
Monday came, and there were new issues. At 3:30PM, interns at the company called me to tell me that they were unable to login to the website’s backend yet again.
Investigation showed that files had been changed at 2:30PM, an hour before they called. I told them I would call them back, made the required changes, and got it all up and running again.
The first intern I talked to didn’t know anything about setting up an account with us, but would pass me onto the person who did that.
Of course, the second intern didn’t know anything about setting up an account with us, but would pass me onto the owner. “Oh, she’s not in, but I’ll have her call you back tomorrow!”
Today … I never received a call from them. I called the company again, attempted to speak to the owner, and was told, “Oh, I’m sorry she didn’t call you back. But she doesn’t know you, and isn’t comfortable setting up an account when she doesn’t know what it’s for.”
“It’s for fixing your website,” I explained. “I’ve been trying to get hold of her since last week.”
“No, really? You didn’t talk to anyone here,” she said in a sarcastic tone.
“No, I spoke with your sysadmin, her husband, last Thursday,” I explained. “We need to get this situation resolved. I need to speak with her, and get this straightened out.”
“Well, what is it that you do?” she asked.
“Well, you call us for help, we fix it. Like when you called me yesterday,” I explained.
“Well, she doesn’t know you, and, uhh, we might not use you anyway.”
“That’s a bit rough,” I said firmly. “You’re leaving me in a position where my only recourse is to revert the fixes I’ve made and leave you with it. I don’t want to have to do that…”
“Well, okay, I’ll call her right now,” she agreed.
An hour later, I get a call from my partner company.
“Mark, she’s going off that you’re making terrorist threats against her website!”
“Man, I’m still trying to get hold of her. Her intern said she wouldn’t call me because they don’t know me.”
“That’s ridiculous … I sent them the e-mail last week!” he exclaimed.
“Yeah, and it’s their sysadmin’s position that if they break anything on the site right now, that they’ve already paid for it with setup,” I explained. “But he’s going to have his wife call me, only, she won’t talk to me, because she doesn’t know me.”
“Well, she said she’s not going to do business with any company that starts making terroristic threats against her website.”
“Maybe you should give her the number for Homeland Security,” I told him.
We had a bit of a laugh at the nonsense of the situation.
Nobody can fault me on my Customer Service skills. For that matter, no one can say I’ve ever been unfair when issues like these have arisen.
This is simply a client who’s attempting to get out of paying their bill. A previous maintenance company allowed them to pay with barter dollars, so I’m guessing they’re a bit miffed at having to come up with cash or a credit card to for the service.
Some customers nobody needs.
But in the meantime — I’m a website terrorist! *thumbs up*
Should I start wearing a turban?
From The Week:
A convicted terrorist and murderer who was released from prison last month is suing a German tabloid—for calling her a terrorist and a murderer. Brigitte Mohnhaupt, 57, served 24 years in prison for nine murders she helped carry out in the 1970s as a key member of the Red Army Faction, a leftist terrorist group.
This poor chick. She spends 24 years in the German poke. I mean, she only took out nine folks when she was part of the Red Army Faction, right? As if it isn’t sad enough when one ends up spending all of one’s prime years in prison. But to get out, and to be ready to try to move on to a new life, say one where she can peddle Mary Kay products, only to find that the media is making fun of you for being such a sucky terrorist.
I mean, her ego must be completely shot. So, she decides to sue the rag that’s “defaming” her reputation as a kick ass terrorist, not a sorry excuse for one.
Sorry sister. You’re an idiot. Put your big girl panties on and handle it!
