Twins are certainly not as rare as they used to be, occurring in approximately 1 in 300 births, but most are dizygotic — fraternal twins. Only around 31% of those twins are monozygotic — identical twins. Still, when you mentions twins, people automatically think of the more rare form: “But they don’t look anything alike!”

Seriously, this whole tattoo thing is getting old. Every day, someone’s on my Facebook feed sporting their “new ink.” And half of those, they can’t afford to feed their kids or pay back the money they borrowed, but they can afford a $200 tattoo? Some people just shouldn’t be allowed to breed…

And it’s not just the tattoos, but this whole “Tribal Subculture” bullshit, which includes body piercings, gauging and, less popularly, cutting. Or you can mix and match: tattoo a large breasted woman on your leg, and complete it with implants that make Dolly Parton look like a 12-year-old boy.

Tribal, my ass. What Tribe did all this? It must’ve been that Emo tribe on the Pacific Rim, long extinct because of their mass suicide…

Although, I think that could get boring real fast…

In contrast to dogs, cats rub your legs because they want attention — not because they’re horny.

By contrast, lock a friend and your dog in the trunk for twelve hours. Which one will be happy to see you when you open it?