Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

Negative Campaigning for Team Jacob

October 8th, 2012 at 5:09 pm by Mark
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I suppose those of you who are completely enraptured with the story of a young woman’s heart-wrenching decision between bestiality and necrophilia will be thrilled to see the next installment of Twilight next month…

Facebook: Now Available for Doctors

October 7th, 2012 at 5:02 pm by Mark
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Facebook’s new, improved CAPTCHA images are certain to recreate the feeling of attempting to read a prescription.

Click the latest trend about Doctors Plastic Surgery online services.

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

Nicki Minaj Poses as Spongebob Squarepants

October 6th, 2012 at 7:20 pm by Mark
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Faced with this image, an annoyed Minaj replied, “You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe! You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe! You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe!”

I replied, “*Ho. *Ho. *Ho.”

Technical Support Isn’t

October 6th, 2012 at 5:09 pm by Mark
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I’ll bet Dell and AT&T are scouting this guy for a Senior Technical Support Assistant job right now!

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

How to Literally Tweet on Twitter

October 5th, 2012 at 5:40 pm by Mark
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There is a fine line between Genius and Insanity. Apparently, that line is made of suet…