Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

Is It Time to Change Your Social Behavior?

January 30th, 2015 at 5:17 pm by Mark
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I can name several thousand people in my general vicinity who would certainly benefit from taking the advice in this book…

Book: "How Not to Be a Dick"  So many people need to read this.

Why Dogs Follow You to the Bathroom

January 27th, 2015 at 7:55 pm by Mark
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This makes complete sense, especially when I consider one dog who incessantly peed on the toilet…

Philosoraptor: Does your dog follow you to the bathroom because you follow it outside, so the dog thinks maybe that's what it's supposed to do?

Stock Photos

The Lost Art of Book Covers

January 25th, 2015 at 5:56 pm by Mark
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It’s always funny to see how book covers and movie posters begin to resemble each other during certain time periods…

White People Almost Kissing: A Book by Nicholas Sparks

The Holy Bible: “Signed Copy”

January 25th, 2015 at 1:37 pm by Mark
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Ummm … I’m almost 100% certain the signature is a forgery, but, uhh …

The Holy Bible, ESV.  "Signed Copy"

Get $20 of bonus stock when you make a deposit on Stash!

4chan for Dummies

January 24th, 2015 at 5:14 pm by Mark
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As many have heard on the news, 4chan’s somewhat infamous administrator, Christopher “moot” Poole (known affectionately by his followers as “fag”), is moving on to greener endeavors, leaving the “Anti-social media” site’s day-to-day operations to a reliable team.

Many have been confused by the fact that this made national news, as they usually associate 4chan with a “hacker subculture.” In fact, for eleven and a half years, 4chan has been the single-most prolific collection of Internet “random” that exists, garnering over 42 billion pageviews. That it has very few rules regarding content — and even a few subject-boards with no rules — has earned it a reputation as the delicious, gooey center of twisted, sick Internet humor.

If you’re still sure what that means, 4chan can be summed this easily:

4CHAN Anon: "Fuck off and enjoy your shekels you fucking faggot. You won't be missed. What's next for his career?"  Anon: "Where do we go now?  8can is filth. redit is shit. Wat do"  Anon: "We could go out and talk to people in the real life world."  Anon: "Honest answers pls."