I’ll be the asshole at the drive-thru trying to pay for my upsized double-quarter-pounder with four two-liter Dr. Peppers…

While everyone remembers the demise of the Twinkie, only a handful of people remembered that Hostess also produced Wonder Bread. They will now be distinctly remembered in History for their poor product packaging layout, marketing their bread to Smart White Kids instead of other minorities…

Even better with whipped cream and chocolate syrup…

While this sort of abbreviation might be okay for the inventory control system, it’s simply not suitable for customers. Especially customers like me who immediately think, “Just how tasty are they?” “Are they made with real ass?” or “How many white people can they fit in a box that small?”

Doesn’t bother me.

I ate at Panda Garden last night, which has a picture of a Koala on its sign. Around the corner from them is a “Christan” book store, which had “Fifty Shades of Grey” proudly displayed in the window. Just up from there was the Mattress Outlet, which only sold waterbeds.

Strip malls are always bizarre…