When I think about the really bad 80’s movie, The Lost Boys (starring a couple of Corey’s and a young 24 Star), the only thing that’s truly memorable is Grandpa’s line at the end…

That’s one thing I always hated about Santa Carla… all the goddamn vampires!

     Apparently, Lawndale, California will have no such problem, thanks to patriots like Councilman Jim Ramsey.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bNvt-z0QiM

     When you consider Lawndale’s geographic location, it’s pretty sound logic, methinks.  There are plenty of things that suck around there.

Hat tip Sara @ Daily Shite

     I was sitting around a few weeks ago, and R.B. Morris came in, sat down and said, “Hey, man.”  Typical conversation followed, as per usual.
     “Hey, man, I got something for you,” he said as he turned looking for something. “Hey, here’s my new CD! I just got them today, so don’t say I never gave ya nothin’!” And there it was, his brand new CD, Spies Lies and Burning Eyes.
     “Ummm, okay, so, umm, I should take this thing and rip it to MP3 and post it on the Internet, huh?”
     “You can do whatever you want to with it, man! Just… Hey, wait…”

     And thus, once we got my inner — and outer — smartass out of the way, R.B.’d made a pretty cool decision.
     “Man, ya know what, I just want this out there,” he said. “I want the public hearing it.  I want to focus on the CD Release Party on January 30th at Barley’s, and I want people to get the word out!”
     “But, remember … isn’t track four about me?” I grinned, as a silly reference to a conversation weeks before.
    “Not you, Mark Steel.  It’s about…” he trails, looking at the next guy coming in the door, and points… “Him!”

     And so, without further adieu… we bring you…

R.B. Morris – Spies Lies and Burning Eyes

     Hope you enjoyed it, and hope to see you at Barley’s Taproom in Knoxville’s Old City on January 30th at 9PM for the Official CD Release Party!

RB MORRIS CD RELEASE SHOW

For his New CD, Spies Lies and Burning Eyes
January 10th, 2010 at Barley’s Taproom
Knoxville, TN

RB Morris, including the old Nashville band featuring Kenny Vaughan, Dave Jacques, and Paul Griffith. Joining along with RB and the Irregulars is Hector Qirko.

Opening the show will be Jake Winstrom (formerly of the Tenderhooks) with his new backing band.

     Now — Spread the word and tell your friends!

     Mark your Calendars, and be there — it’s your penance for listening to, and probably attempting to steal, his music for free over the Internet. 😉

For more info about RB Morris, check out his website at http://www.rbmorris.com/ and his MySpace Music page at http://www.myspace.com/rbmorrismusic.

     “General” Larry Platt — as opposed to a single, specific Larry Platt — seems to have caused a stir in the world of reality television and the Internet by singing and dancing to his original masterwork, “Pants on the Ground.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFx4-gyo1_0

     This does, of course, underscore the reason I don’t watch television.  But I’m certain that the brilliant marketing automation tools and machine which is Fox Network’s American Idol just gathered a few million new viewers for airing this foolishness… Speaking of marketing, you may also want to use decals to reach people, customers or viewers. Most people still consider these advertising methods compared to online strategy.

     Not to be outdone, of course, NBC had their own take on this soon-to-be-hit song, thanks to the talented sarcasm of former Saturday Night Live star, Jimmy “Neil Young” Fallon.

     Amusingly, Jimmy Fallon’s satirical take made more sense than the actual Neil Young’s last album…

Note: Hat tip to Fracas for pointing out the Jimmy Fallon bit, as I honestly do not watch television.

     In the wake of all this Lane Kiffin controversy, where the former UT Vols coach is skipping out to head USC, I’ve had very little to say but one thing…
     “Lane Kiffin?  Oh, sorry!  I didn’t even realize UT had a coach.”

     Only three people laughed. The rest tried to explain, “Oh, yeah, you don’t care about football, huh?  Well, Lane Kiffin was…”
     Yes, the rock I’ve been living under was impenetrable.  These explanations only stand as more proof that people just don’t get sacrilege.  Err, I mean, sarcasm.

     It seems that UT Vols Basketball Coach Bruce Pearl may be hardest hit by the news that Lane Kiffin is leaving, given his statement last year regarding how well he got along with the Football Coach:

I’m trying to date his wife. But that’s not working out too good.

     Two thousand, one hundred eighty-eight miles does tend to add an additional layer of complexity to his covetous courting.

     Perhaps unsurprisingly, as if she’s been being whisked off to another country never to be seen or heard from again, literally thousands of Tennesseeans are searching Google and other search engines for photos of Layla Kiffin nude.  As if there are any naked pics of Layla Kiffin lying thoughtlessly around the Internet…
     Numerous bloggers have lamented Kiffin’s decision to leave based on their lust for Layla’s sweater kittens, however few have managed to convey their emotions so succinctly as Sports Pickle.  

     Personally, I find it interesting they should reference both breasts and Governor Bredesen in the same paragraph… again… But I digress…

     Perhaps it’s just me, but rather than “HOT,” I prefer to think of her as ‘decorative,’ as in, “may look nice loosely draped over a couch, where the color of her hair might possibly match the otherwise sparse decor.”  Not that I particularly give a damn about interior design, or even own a couch, but the whole Barbie Doll^™ thing has never done much for me.  I generally prefer womens’ brains to be equally as large as their breasts.
     I mean … perhaps it’s a bit prejudicial, but she doesn’t exactly scream, “Rocket Surgeon,” to me.

     But as for looking at photos of hot women with large breasts, I have my own stash to look at, taken with my own damn camera from 2007 and 2008… God… I miss those… err, I mean, her, back then she used to have the best breast augmentation and other surgeries to have a fit body and feel good with herself. 

Note: Barbie is a Registered Trademark of Mattel Toys, God forbid they try and sue me, too.

Note: The term “Rocket Surgeon” is based loosely on the statement, “It’s not rocket surgery!” delivered several years ago by the bartender formerly known as Antoinette, now made famous by the captioned photograph hanging in Knoxville’s Preservation Pub.

     So this past weekend, I had a completely ridiculous random thought.  It actually wasn’t about any particular readers of this blog mind you, but came about because of Pete Venkman’s comeback, “No, it sounds like you have enough people in there already,” in Ghostbusters.
     Yeah, I watched Ghostbusters.  Yes, again.  Yes, of course I thought the video game was hilarious.  That’s partially why I decided to watch the movie again.  Seriously?  Whatever… Anyway… *snicker*

     So basically, umm…

     If they had Multiple Personality Disorder, would it count as group sex?  I wonder how crazy would the dirty talk get if they were “all” into it?

     There is, of course, a reason those questions are labeled as rhetoric. 😉