You’re in a bar, let’s say.  The guy next to you says, “Oh, man, check out that ass!”
     “Go talk to her!”
     “Nah, I’m shy and quiet.”

     You pull out your trusty digital camera, and start snapping pics of different stuff going on, and offer to take a few of the girl.  When she turns around to walk away, you snap a picture of her butt.  
     When you come back and sit at the table, you show him the pictures you took of her.
     As she walks by, you show her.  Women love to look at their own photos.  She says, “Oh, nice pic, bad pic, oooooh, I hate that one…”
     Then you get to the butt pic.  “Ooooh, that’s nice…”
     She says, “Yeah, it is!  Whose butt is that?”
     “Yours,” you grin.  “But I’ll bet we can do a better one than that.”

     And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you get a hot young thing to climb up and lean over the bar and stare back at you seductively as you snap off a few more shots.

     Any questions?

     This article from the Britain Sunday Times …

[Tennis-star, Martina] Navratilova defended the “right” of sheep to be gay.

     *cough*

     Do gay sheep bleat with a lisp?

     Truly, there are a lot of idiots in the world.  The conviction, and subsequent execution, of Saddam Hussein — by his own citizens — is certainly proving it.

      A perfect example of people losing their damn minds comes from India, where, in the northern state of Uttar Pradesh, Samajwadi Party general secretary Beni Prasad Verma (a lefty Islamist, no less) claimed that George Bush is “the biggest terrorist in the world.” Seems he’s all about getting those around him riled up with anti-American sentiment despite the fact that Saddam was convicted and executed by the very people he used to rule.
      All in all, it seems a very nasty place for an Indian politician to be sticking his nose, but then I guess his sort are pretty common these days. It’s little wonder that Prime Minister Manmohan Singh was mentioning, just the other day, that that state specifically is “in need of modern leadership.”
     Why, I’ll bet right there in Uttar Pradesh, just a hop-skip-and-a-jump from the Kashmir, there’re even a few Islamic fundamentalists who were inspired by the snippet and are declaring jihad at this very moment! Let’s hope they’re at least as stupid as the British attempted-shoe-bomber Richard Reid…

      It’s a little funny, since you certainly don’t hear any anti-American sentiment in the execution video.  Seems like most people who lived under the thumb of that maniac in Iraq are overwhelmingly happy the man is dead.
     And while I’ve wrestled with the thought that perhaps I shouldn’t post this video, stolen from a camera phone, I finally thought… why not?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Av1JpCbY884

     Here’s the obligatory holiday photo…

     I missed the Thanksgiving post because I was busy enjoying myself during what was certainly the event that I was most thankful for in 2006.  Miranda and I spent some good, quality time together discussing everything that went wrong during our marriage, and making our apologies where they were applicable.
     Sure, divorce is divorce, and it is the end, but it’s always better when you can part as friends.  And hey, everybody can use a few more friends.  With that, we have all the closure we need to go ahead and get on with our lives.
     So, Miranda, my friend, I hope all of you on your side of the world, and the rest, have wonderful and memorable Holidays. 🙂 *toasts*

     To my family, hey…  *toasts*

     To Mr. & Ms. Swanky, here’s to you guys.  You know why.  *toasts*

     To the Bloggers I’ve talked to, met, hung out with and e-mailed over the last year, kudos, and here’s to a great new year.  *toasts*

     To my customers & clients, we’ve had a good year through all our ups and downs.  I truly appreciate the business, loyalty and reciprocity we’ve all achieved this year.  *toasts*

     To my new neighbors, who’ve been great to hang out with and talk to the second half of the year. *toasts*

     To my friends, both new and old, thanks for the wild times and here’s to us making a few more. *toasts*

     To my Pirate Chicks (possessive little bastard I am), certainly, you girls have certainly made my year.  You’re every one individual and unique, some loud and some quiet, some bold and some shy, some aggressive and some passive, but I know damn well when the shit hits the fan, every damn one of you would be right there with me — and for any of you, I’d do the same.
     You’ve made the good times better, and the bad times bearable, if not hilarious.  *hugs* I love every damn one of ya.  *toasts*

     It just wouldn’t be like me to get all sappy and not leave something sarcastic.

     So, to all the ladies, a special gift, courtesy of NBC…

     Japanese, especially, seem infatuated with American pop-culture and enjoy using English language as a design element due to its flexibility of style.  Put simply, English is readable in hundreds of thousands of differents fonts and styles, where Japanese may be readable in, let’s say, five or ten.

     I’ve always laughed at people who get Asian tattoos.  They have no idea what the symbols that they imprint upon their bodies represent.  They merely know that they’re in “some” Asian language, and are supposed to mean, “Peace,” “Serenity,” “Good Fortune” or something more personal to them.
     Thanks to engrish.com, we can find all sorts of Japanese making the same mistakes…