After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnetâ„¢ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy.
Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.
April 21st, 2013 at 5:48 pm by Mark
Tags: chinese, food, fu king, funny signs, innuendo, restaurants
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April 20th, 2013 at 5:36 pm by Mark
Tags: food, math, pi, pie, sarcasm
Just like I’ve always said — pie are not squared. They are round.

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April 19th, 2013 at 5:53 pm by Mark
Tags: condoms, funny signs, psa, safe sex, safety
As we all know — or should know — even spermicidally lubricated condoms are only 99% effective. Don’t be the 1%.

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April 18th, 2013 at 9:09 pm by Mark
Tags: advertising, graffiti, health, healthcare, heart disease, irony, men, stubborn
Sounds like some women I know, too. 😉

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April 17th, 2013 at 5:01 pm by Mark
Tags: asshats, camera, cellphones, duckface, facebook, phones, telephones
For those who make Duckface photos, prepare to be shamed, because what can be seen cannot be unseen.

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