My grandfather always told me not to date a boy that didn’t carry a pocket knife. It’s a good quote. I’ve certainly learned my lesson!

While it may seem uncharacteristically sexist to some, it’s also good to have a sense of humor and think, “This is what Mark should have done back 2008!” lol

At least it wasn’t a Terrorist Lobster who ran into the middle of the kitchen screaming, “Arthropodu ackbar!” while detonating an improvised explosive device… I really hate when that happens.

Why pay $12.95 when you can get an entire set of Ronco knives for only $9.99?