This just proves that if you’re not intelligent enough to comprehend what you’re reading on Twitter, you should probably stick to Instagram. It also shows that Anderson Cooper, despite all evidence to the contrary, may actually be a human being with a hint of personality.
There is a fine line between Genius and Insanity. Apparently, that line is made of suet…
I’m sure everyone remembers Ashton Applewhite’s Truly Tasteless Jokes books back in the 80’s (written under the name Blanche Knott), each with numerous entries about dead babies, painful dismemberments and, more notably, Helen Keller.
If you enjoyed that sort of thing and Political Correctness hasn’t completely ruined you, you should check out Helen Keller’s Twitter Page for a few tongue-in-cheeks laughs.
Contrary to popular belief, it was not Orlando Bloom’s Twitter with the quote:
I think Lady Gaga just puts glue on herself and rolls around on random things.
The Twitter account which reportedly posted it in January 2012 is an Orlando Bloom spoof/fan account, thus its repeated mis-attribution to good ol’ Legolas. I managed to find the same quip on a greeting card dated April 5th, 2011, so it’s certainly been out there a while. Regardless of the source, it’s still funny, considering…
Fracas gave me reason #8934 I shouldn’t use Twitter. I blame my complete and total lack of self control on her, since she’s the one who pointed out that stupid #oneletteroffmovies bit, where you take a movie title and change one letter for an entirely different meaning…
Needless to say, my Twitter Traffic has been disturbingly high.
Mark Ruffalo stars as the entire cast in Ruffalo Soldiers. #oneletteroffmovies
1 minute agoLittle chance of being frightened at this pathetic, cult musical comedy: Little Shot of Horrors #oneletteroffmovies
1 minute agoHorror/Shocker as an escort establishment suffers from a rash of pregnancies. Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Brood #oneletteroffmovies
3 minutes agoPuffy Combs makes a deal with Baalzebub. Bedizzled. #oneletteroffmovies
6 minutes agoJim Carrey stalks Matthew Broderick in: The Cable Gay. #oneletteroffmovies
8 minutes agoMore of Howard Stern’s assinine humor. Private Farts. #oneletteroffmovies
8 minutes agoRoger’s getting a little old to still be single…. Roger Codger #oneletteroffmovies
8 minutes agoMeanwhile, Lorraina Bobbit has her own plans… Deconstructing Hairy #oneletteroffmovies
10 minutes agoAlfred Hitchcock’s protaginst suffers from ED. The Trouble with Hairy. #oneletteroffmovies
11 minutes agoGena Rowlands and Winona Ryder know which Wayne’s World star they find attractive. Night on Garth #oneletteroffmovies
12 minutes agoCapt. Yossarian escapes the horror of World War II by making magic brownies. Batch-22 #oneletteroffmovies
13 minutes agoBasketball coach Billy Bob Thornton finds out he really is above average… Mr. Hoodcock #oneletteroffmovies
15 minutes agoKatherine Waterston reveals her nickname for the breasts she’s about to expose. The Babysisters. #oneletteroffmovies
16 minutes agoHe came. He saw. He acted like a pervert. Veni! Vidi! Vicie! #oneletteroffmovies
21 minutes agoMay the Bluebird of Happieness forever urinate in your Cheerios. Piss Congeniality. #oneletteroffmovies
24 minutes agoSean Penn knows you lose 21 grams when you die. Now he knows how much he loses when he poops. 219 Grams. #oneletteroffmovies
25 minutes agoMark Ruffalo and Ethan Hawk give up a dangerous life of crime for simple credit card fraud. What Doesn’t Bill You. #oneletteroffmovies
29 minutes agoBruce Willis portrays Greg Luganis and his head-splitting injury: Dive Hard #oneletteroffmovies
31 minutes agoDoes anyone understand why constipation seems to hit caucasians harder? White Men Can’t Dump #oneletteroffmovies
33 minutes agoLila Littleworld realizes Canada is f#&*ing cold in, Frozen Liver #oneletteroffmovies
36 minutes agoWener Hertzog studies English as a Second Language in, Encounters at the End of the Word #oneletteroffmovies
36 minutes agoTommy Lee Jones plays a nasty prank in The Electric Mint #oneletteroffmovies
40 minutes agoDon Cheadle moves to Iowa in Tractor #oneletteroffmovies
40 minutes agoMadea becomes a Meteorologist in Tyler Perry’s Madea Goes to Hail #oneletteroffmovies
42 minutes agoEddit Murphy stars as a robotic blow-up doll in Meat Dave #oneletteroffmovies
43 minutes agoRob Schneider takes a laundry job in prison… The Big Stain #oneletteroffmovies
44 minutes agoStanley Tucci finds Bridget Fonda may not be straight… The Whore Shebang #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoChelsea Makela, Damon Wayans, and an all New Zealand Cast. Dance Flock. #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoGeorge Clooney asks his girlfriend to stop eating spicy food in, Burn After Reaming #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoRenee Zellweger goes anti-semitic in Jew in Town #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoRussel Crow finds Jeebus in State of Pray. #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoJennifer Aniston loses all her hair in Mangement #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour agoWalt Disney present, Tinker Hell! #oneletteroffmovies
about 1 hour ago from webKungPow: Enter the Fish #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours agoHead Again #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours ago9 1/2 Peeks #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours agoTool for Love … (Sam Shepherd/Kim Basinger/Harry Dean Stanton) #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours agoCrapped in Paradise #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours agoThe Mighty Fucks #oneletteroffmovies
about 14 hours ago@ManInTheMittle Lay Anything… #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours agoNever Lay Never Again #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours agoBone With the Wind #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours agoThe Porn Blows at Midnight #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours agoLittle Big Porn #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours ago‘Pucker Up and Bark Like a Dog’ aka ‘Tits’ (http://tinyurl.com/yzjtee5) #oneletteroffmoviesabout 15 hours ago
@stephintoronto Gay After Tomorrow #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours ago from web in reply to stephintorontoTenacious D in The Dick of Destiny #oneletteroffmovies
about 15 hours agoUnsure Cunts (Yes, I couldn’t help it – http://tinyurl.com/yjwr5d3) #oneletteroffmovies
about 16 hours ago
Now, with wasted wit, I can’t even write a decent post.
So, thanks, Fracas, for screwing up my blog with this nonsense! 😉
For clarity’s sake, that was Eddie Murphy, Lila Littlewolf, etc. in the above list. There are a number of typoes. I won’t bother to fix them. Yes, I did that on purpose.
And for that, I blame Dan Quayle.
