It’s no big secret I haven’t been reading a lot of other blogs for a while.  It’s not because I’m a selfish ass, it’s just about time.  Well, that, and that I can’t find an RSS reader I like.  Quite honestly, I wish I had a nipple on my ass just for Google Reader.  While it works well for many, I have nothing but problems with it.

     I’ve been hitting a lot of tangent reads, however, while looking at stats, and I’ve come across some that are just fit right in with my own twisted sense of humor.

      FU, Penguin is absolutely brilliant.  As an animal lover, I just can’t help but look at the beautiful pictures, and think about all the wonderful things this author has to say about each one of God’s creatures.  It just warms my heart, and sometimes, even gives me a woody. I love this blog so much, that I may actually buy the book rather than downloading it from Limewire.

     I found this next blog due to some 17-year-old prick from Michigan writing a crap article about the Ten Five Worst Blogs Ever.  Apparently, his math skills were as bad as his authorship.  I think it comes from buying too many fake drugs from 8 Mile.  So STFU, kiddo.  Eminem you are not.  And neither is Eminem.
     And thus is the introduction to one of my new favorite reads, The Worst SEO Blog Ever!, however SEOHack hasn’t written in days because he’s too busy microblogging stupid shit on Twitter.  If he could pull his head out of his rectum for five minutes, I’d actually like to have a chat with him, because, as the blog suggest, his SEO Blog is tremendously poor, while his SEO Skill is extremely high.  Irreverent, intelligent, and insightful as it may not be, I thoroughly enjoy reading it.

     And while we’re on the subject of finely attuned, irreverent link-whores, we certainly can’t forget our good friend Fracas, who’s closed her old wordpress.com blog in favor of her own domain so that she can put up ads to her heart’s — and pocket book’s — delight.
     Don’t spend all those pennies in one place, Fracas, mah dear.  I mean, seriously, one good Snickers bar, and the blog fund will be broke all over again. 😉

     Ahh, the Internet is a fun place.

     Good night, and good luck.

     For reasons unknown, GEICO Insurance is always lauded for their brilliant marketing.  I cannot understand why.  In my own particularly crass vernacular, I always refer them as GAYCO, thanks in no small part to their annoying, sexually confused lizard who can’t quite pick which borough of London he’s actually from…

     The GEICO Pothole Ad is absolutely The Most Annoying Television Commercial Ever, due in no small part that even though it is less than visually stunning, it additionally contains dialogue which makes me want to repeatedly jab forks into my ears so I can’t never, ever hear it again.

     On second thought, perhaps I should simply hunt down and demand a blood sacrifice from the asshats who made it.

     Once I get that, I can use said sacrifice to eternally torment those damned Burger King people…

     …because if that happened to me, their mascot would certainly be meeting the business end of a personal firearm, with justified cause for self-defense.

     Ahh, which leads to the thought, perhaps I should send them some Advil…

     Apparently, Rachel Ray doesn’t like blue balls.

     But a lot of her audience does…

On November 10th, 2009, Mark Steel posted the following in the article titled “Video Game Stimulates Consumer Spending“:

An obviously perplexed Obama replied, “Umm…”

This quote, attributed to President Barack Obama, was incorrect. The actual quote was:

“Uhhh, well, yes, I mean, well, umm…”

We know that many people rely on us to give unbiased and impartial treatment to breaking news and sincerely regret this lapse in our journalistic integrity, as it diminishes our credibility.

Still, I can see why our writer made this misquote given the circumstances.

As acting Senior Editor of blogitude.com, I apologize, and thank you for bringing this matter to my attention.

Sincerely,
Richard M. Nixon

[ Editor Mark: You left the “a” of ObamA. 😉 lol ]

     After multiple issues after a year and a half, I finally talked a vendor into replacing a temperamental server that’d been causing a one of my clients no end of fits.  And so, at 5AM Tuesday morning, the hard drives were pulled and installed in a brand-spanking-new server.  Miraculously, everything worked.  Or so I thought…

     At 5PM yesterday, I was notified by my customer that, “Our mail server has been down all day.”  I’m not sure why they didn’t contact me about it earlier in the day, but… Further inspection of the server log revealed the following actual error message:

Oct 20 05:53:12 antarctica dovecot: Time just moved backwards by 7307 seconds. This might cause a lot of problems, so I’ll just kill myself now.

     It seems that that when the new server rebooted and went through its normal bit of resetting the time, the mailserver died.  However, since this is the actual error message, as listed in the maillog, it is apparent that their mail server has developed a personality.
     Given its new-found malcontentment and predeliction to suicide, I couldn’t help but think perhaps it needs a companion… I know the perfect one…

     And on that note, I’m going revert to “couch potato” mode and watch Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy…