Author Archive for Mark

After rounding the world four times and getting the piercings, but only having three earrings to show for it because he's too picky about what he'll actually put back in his ear, Mark attempted to settle down back in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee. This, of course, did not happen because, quite apparently, he has been biologically implanted with a PsychoMagnet™ which makes even the most stable of people batshit crazy. Mark is currently "hiding" in wildly public places, and making as much noise as possible, while throngs of anonymous nutjobs accuse him of every salacious deed imaginable, such as the unseasonable rainfall of 2011, the murders of several prominent people who are still very much alive, and the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Mark is a carnivorous smoker who is Politically agnostic, unable to reproduce, refuses all manners of Internet dating, and generally believes that Murphy was an optimist.

“If You Oppose, You’re a Racist!”

August 18th, 2010 at 5:04 pm by Mark
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     I posted this on Facebook about thirty minutes ago, and I don’t think it could be said any more plainly. Apparently, a few people agree, because my original thought is already being re-posted.

Opposing building a Mosque at Ground Zero is no more racist than opposing building a Cowboy Theme Park at Wounded Knee, or picketing a German History Museum being built next door to a burned Synagogue. It wasn’t Cowboys who killed Indians at Wounded Knee, nor are all Germans Nazis. But it’s still poor taste, plain and simple, and were it either of the latter, the “compassionate Left” would be up in arms.

     I’m tired of being called a Racist, when it’s entirely not true!  I guess thirty years is enough for the average idiot to forget what they knew as children…

     So when we’re talking about “tolerance and understanding,” I can’t help but ask all the “Politically Correct” people…

    Why do you insist on labeling people, and underscoring their color, race, creed and nationality at every turn? What shows more prejudice — being color blind and standing up for an ideal, or constantly underscoring color, creed and nationality and putting them all in the same box?  

     Seems it’s you guys who keep speaking of all of your “Muslim friends.” Or your “Mexican friends.” Or your “Black friends.

     Umm … who’s the Racist? Because to me, they’re just my friends.

     Without the occasional Social faux pas, no one ever learns a damn thing.

The Hand of the Almighty (NSFW)

August 16th, 2010 at 11:00 am by Mark
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“Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it. Amen.” — Monty Python and the Holy Grail, 1975

Robinhood: Free Stocks for your Referrals!

Craziest Name for August 2010

August 12th, 2010 at 1:00 pm by Mark
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This one beats July’s winner, Anita Little-Ganus, who isn’t even bi-curious.

A Real “Convenience” Store

August 11th, 2010 at 9:00 pm by Mark
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Hopefully, they put “GUESS WHAT!  We now sell Condoms!!!” on the beer fridge, too.

Guess What? WE NOW SELL WINE! WE NOW SELL BEER!!

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Online Shopping Fail (NSFW)

August 9th, 2010 at 5:00 pm by Mark
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Well, given they’re never gonna see a real woman naked… (Make sure you scroll down 😉 )

Amazon Fail: People who bounght this Flehslight-style device also play World of Warcraft